posted 1 year ago in Married Life
  • poll: Would you ever be a SAHW/FI/SO? (not SAHM)
    Are you kidding me? In a heartbeat if I could. : (111 votes)
    37 %
    No way. I would never feel comfortable knowing I could be working but I'm not. : (146 votes)
    49 %
    I am, but not by choice. : (19 votes)
    6 %
    I am, and I love it! : (22 votes)
    7 %
  • Member
    1473 posts
    Bumble bee

    A stay at home mom? Absolutely. But a stay at home wife? Hardly. I know a girl from high school who is a stay at home wife by choice, and I find it laughable how hard and stressful she thinks her life is…She was bitching the other day about their housekeepers vaccuuming while she was trying to watch The View. Give me a break.

    4326 posts
    Honey bee

    No, I have nothing against people that do this, but I do like working. Granted I may be a SAHM soon….but without kids I just couldn’t. I am on maternity leave now and I really can’t stand it.

    657 posts
    Busy bee
    • kjo
    • 1 year ago

    I am a stay at home mom.

    I call stay at home wives lazy (Sorry if you happen to be one). Even if you are ridiculously rich, you could do something worthwhile with your time!  Unless you are retired, but then you earned that right!

    As soon as my kids go to school, I will be going straight back to work!

    6826 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    No, not entirely. My fiance wants me to stay at home [cook, clean and such], but I don’t want to quit my job. Once we are financially stable, i have agreed to go down to 3 days a week.

    8046 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    @oneofthesethings:  In theory it sounds lovely but in reality I think I would feel pretty useless.

    I’d also worry that I would be completely screwed if he ever left me. It would be hard to get a job if I wasn’t in the work force for a few years.

    I don’t love the 9-5 thing and I would love to have a job/home business etc that let me have more time at home or away from the traditional office setting, but staying at home doing nothing I would probably go stir crazy.


    250 posts
    Helper bee

    I’d go crazy, bore myself to death and then shrivel up and die. lol. But I currently kind of am :/ Desperately looking for a job though?

    10655 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    No way, I’d get so bored! Also you might as well make as much money to save up as you can now – even if your second income is just fun money!  I can’t imagine having gone through all the school I did and not using my degrees!  

    I’d consider being a SAHM or working part time then but while I have no kids I might as well. I love my job, going to work and interacting with my coworkers. 

    277 posts
    Helper bee

    I’m currently a stay at home fiancee, but it’s not by choice.  I just graduated and now I’m applying for jobs, just haven’t found anything yet.  Hopefully soon, although it’s a bit slow right now what with Christmas and everything.  

    I’d love to be able to be a stay at home mom when we have kids (though that won’t happen because Vancouver is too expensive), but I don’t really like being a stay at home fiancee.  I feel so useless.  I want to contribute!

    2566 posts
    Sugar bee

    No. I love my job and I love the independence that comes with contributing outside the home. I’m also not spending 5 years in grad school jumping through hoops to stay at home lol.

    10364 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    I think being a SAHW is putting yourself in a very vulnerable position. I saw what happened to my mom when my dad divorced her and she had not worked in 23 years. There is no circumstance under which I would put myself in that position. Way too wrapped up in having my own firm career foundation to hold myself up with.

    3186 posts
    Sugar bee

    No way. Several years back I was laid off. I was bored out of my skull! I could only clean so much – and then what? I crafted some, looked for jobs, ran errands. I felt like my mind was turning to mush. I hated it. I had no mental stimulation. Plus, I started resenting my life, my husband, everything. I felt like all there was for me to do was clean, do laundry, etc. And there’s WAY more to life than that! I missed my job, I missed my work friends.

    I’ve always said – even if I was independently wealthy and didn’t have to work, I still would. I enjoy it.

    1331 posts
    Bumble bee

    I would be bored silly if I didn’t at least have something part time.  Plus what if something worst case happened, like he was fired, injured and couldn’t work, died, etc. or if we split.  It’d be one thing if we had kids, but for now I can’t see any reason why I would not work if I am able to.

    103 posts
    Blushing bee

    NO NO NO!!

    I don’t even intend on being a SAHM!!!  We’ve already discussed what will happen when we have kids and he will quit work!  I own more and I love my job, absolutely no chance of me sitting about at home!!

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