Save the dates not matching 'theme'?

posted 2 years ago in Paper
  • poll: Do save the dates need to match?
    Yes, everything should be cohesive : (8 votes)
    12 %
    No, it's fine if the std and invites have different styles : (56 votes)
    85 %
    Other - please share below : (2 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 2
    4583 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I did not do STD’s, but if I had… I definitely would not have matched them to a theme.

    If I had sent them out, they would have been postcards with our picture on them with simple information. My invitations I picked out right before ordering (after spending MONTHS combing websites to find a design I liked). Now, I’m working on ordering some thank you cards, and those won’t look like the inviations either.

    People won’t notice, and if they do… it’s your wedding and money, so you can decide what to do for them all.

    Post # 3
    2428 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I don’t think it matters! As long as you have some connection to it, ie that you love to read, it won’t be weird or confusing. 

    Post # 4
    941 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    spiffanee:  I think it is absolutely fine if the STD doesn’t match the invites. There is plenty of time between the two going out – no one will even notice or care! 

    Post # 5
    2782 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    spiffanee:  We had a rather quick engagement- so we wanted to get STDs out right away.

    I made them at home on the computer.  We didn’t even have everything else picked out yet (engagement was on only 4.5 months)- so ultimately, I made them pretty neutral, but they did not end up “matching” or even “complimenting” the rest of our wedding, so to speak.

    I say go for it– they are kind of like thier own little thing– if ya know what I mean– and the invite is what will start to “tie the event together” IMO.

    Post # 6
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Ours matched.

    Post # 7
    1500 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: Disneyland - January 2016

    I think it’s completely up to the couple. No, they don’t have to match and they don’t look bad if they don’t match.

    For us, personally, I do want them to match, and I’m starting to grow irritated that I can’t find anything that I like that still matches our theme (and won’t cost an arm and a leg). I interpret the STD as what sets the tone for the rest of the wedding since it’s the first thing our guests will receive pertaining to it, so I definitely want it to give off the right kind of vibe (and clue that it’s technically a destination wedding).

    Post # 8
    6980 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2009 - Barr Mansion

    Mine didn’t and I didn’t care and neither did any of our guests. A friend designed our save the dates for free, and I loved them. We hadn’t really solidified our “theme” by that point anyway. I don’t think it matters, except maybe for very formal or traditional weddings.

    Post # 9
    4638 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I think things should be cohesive. I see no point of haphazardly slapping together a bunch of stuff you like just because you like it.. Surely you can find STDs that you like and that fit your ‘theme’.

    What you send your guests sets the tone for the style of wedding and I think its important for them to match in terms of formality at the very least. Plus, I think taking the time to ensure everything you’re selecting works together shows you care and that you’ve put thought into what you’re doing.

    Post # 10
    4483 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Mine will match, as long as the seller I used for stds doesn’t close shop before I order invitations. I love the simple elegance and reasonable prices. However, I wouldn’t care (or likely notice) if someone else’s were different.

    Post # 11
    2551 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    I wanted ours to match, but it’s likely they won’t if we want to save money.  Life goes on!

    Post # 12
    1670 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    I think it’s more important that the actual invitations match your theme, if only to provide to the guests a sense of what to wear, how formal or informal, what to expect, etc. For example, you wouldn’t send out a child’s birthday invite with photos of water slides and a pool and then have a cute little lemonade/sandwiches party with everyone dressed up. Haha.

    But Save the Dates? They go out a while before, and as long as they’re not drastically misleading (elegant black and white formal and then your wedding is a jeans/t-shirt BBQ) I think it’s fine for them to not “match.”

    Post # 13
    669 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2015 - Family Farm


    spiffanee:  We are having what I would call classic invitations. The Save the Dates are Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy themed. I LOVE IT!

    I don’t think that stuff has to match at all. Have fun with the StD’s.

    Post # 14
    1670 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Our Save the Dates did not “match” our invitations or reflect our wedding colors – our wedding was formal, so we had formal invites (letterpress, black ink on heavy cardstock).

    Our Save the Dates were cards in a color that looked good with the engagement picture we wanted to use – I knew our colors when we ordered them, but I wanted to use a picture of us in Times Square at night, so the text on the card was black and red, not peach and gold. I could have ordered matching Save the Dates from our invitation vendor, but I really wanted to use the photo. It was definately less formal, but nobody seemed to mind, even my ettiquite-obsessed southern mother. The invitation is the real harbinger of formality.

    It does not matter. Get what you like. Personally, while our wedding had colors and a level of formality, I couldn’t believe how many people asked me what my theme was. Weddings don’t need a theme, just good taste and a coherent vision – which does not need to extend matchy-matchy save the dates.

    Post # 15
    851 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2015


    spiffanee:  Go for it! Save the dates are just a fun way to tell everyone your date!! I did hockey themed STDs and my invites are completely different!!

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