Weddingbee boards

Not gonna lie, it's not a cake walk being PG (at least for most women).  I didn't like it for the most part, but it wasn't scary.  I never knew what was coming next and things were constantly going wrong: a m/c with my first PG, pelvic rest at 6 wks, hormone supplements/blood draws, bed rest at 7 months, pre-term labor scares, tearing, etc.  All that said, it was all managable.  Did it suck sometimes?  Yes.  But I made it through with a healthy child who I adore and made it all worth it.  

Truth be told, the labor part wasn't that bad, and if you get the epi, then it's really not that bad.  You CAN do it, physically.  Whether you are ready for it mentally is something only you can know.  Have you ever tackled a challenge that you were afraid/unsure of?  What did you do to get yourself over that hurdle?  Starting a new job, a new relationship, moving somewhere new for college... these are all times that we take a risk and don't know how everything is going to play out, no matter the planning that goes into it.  When you get PG, you can plan for every possibility and life can still deal you an unexpected hand, and you just have to go with it.  

Things you can control that will make the process less anxiety-ridden: find a doctor that makes you completely comfortable (don't wait till you're PG to do this), get to where you are financially comfortable so that if you have complications, you're not worried about taking the time off that you need to stay healthy, seek out a girlfriend or two that has a calming influence and has kids as a go-to source of info so that you're not jumping to google every time you have a twinge if you choose to get PG, and I think even at this point, it would be a good idea for you to read the book "The Best Birth".  That book was such a calming influence for me as I got closer to delivery, and I think it would be helpful for the whole pregnancy too.  It's written by a labor/delivery nurse turned birth coach who is all for a relaxed/happy/healthy mama and baby, no matter how you get there.

Well it sounds like you're husband is pretty much on board with whatever you want to do and is all for adoption, so if pregnancy isn't for you that is perfectly ok and NOT selfish at all. You have support in whatever you choose so hopefully that helps a bit.

I have a history of anxiety, panic attacks and stomach troubles caused by this. I don't have it nearly as badly as many other people do, but I was worried when I got pregnant that I would have terrible panic attacks over the fear of becoming a mother. I actually feel great and have not had ONE panic attack since being pregnant. I think it's because when I'm anxious I feel all out of whack with the world and unsure of what's going on, but now my body is doing exactly what it's meant to do and I feel so at ease about it. I'm also so exhausted half the time I don't think I could muster up the energy to be anxious. Once you're pregnant that's it, the baby has to come out and everything has to work out because that's the only option. The thing is you have to learn about what's going on in your body and be aware of how that could effect your nerves. For example, you'll have much more blood volume while pregnant which can cause you to become short of breath and makes your heart work harder, and sometimes can feel like that feeling in your chest when a panic attack starts. You just have to remind yourself that it's normal and your body it's designed to handle this. Another thing is the queasiness/vomitting which can sometimes feel like a nervous stomach.

I think if you aren't in behavior therapy yet now is a good time to start. You could learn breathing techniques, meditation, the biology of anxiety etc. Maybe if you work to minimize your anxiety now you'll feel more prepared to handle the anxieties that come with pregnancy.

STAY AWAY FROM GOOGLE! Do not google anything when searching for information. It is confusing and frustrating and some times just scares the crap out of you. This is not always the case but lots of the time it is so. Look for educational books and ask for information from doctors or nurses or even close friends.

I get really bad anxiety just getting needles, I cry and hyperventilate every time. I actually make them take me to a room so I can lie down, it helps me cope better. I am terrified of giving birth and I am 6 weeks pregnant. What I am doing to get my self through is educate my self and figure out what is going to work for me, a lot like how I deal with getting blood taken. It isn't so scary when you know the process and you realize that your body is made to do this. There is so much good stuff about being pregnant too! I am soo excited to hear the heart beat, and feel LO kick for the first time. And that moment when you hear their voice for the first time. It will make it so worth it in the end.

Agree with all PP that it will help you to educate yourself as much as possible for what happens when you get pregnant.  There are some great websites that detail what is happening through each week of pregnancy, and books as well.  You mentioned you like to be well informed, so that hopefully would help quell some anxiety you feel.

However, the fact that you get so anxious that you throw up once a week is concerning.  Are you seeking counseling for your anxiety, or at minimum, medication to control it?  It sounds a little bit more intense than just a pregnancy fear.  It might help you to have someone professional to talk through some of your worries with.  Anxiety is often chemical and not necessarily purely psychological, and so I hope for your health and well being that you at least consider getting professional help.