Post # 1
I have scars on my shoulders and back. As a kid/teen it really bothered me and I was super self-conscious. But when I met my fiance 7 years ago, he made me feel beautiful regardless, and since meeting him I’ve worn strapless things before with confidence. Over the years, I’ve all but forgotten about the scars, and they play no part anymore in choosing my wardrobe.
When I began dress shopping, I didn’t even think twice about trying on strapless dresses. But one of my trips, as I was showing off my favorite dresses (all of which were strapless) for my aunts, one of my aunts asked me if I planned on getting a chemical peel or some kind of microdermabrasion treatment on my shoulders/back so I could look better.
She made me feel like “uh oh, are my scars THAT noticeable?” I personally don’t mind them, but I don’t really want them to be super noticeable on my wedding day. So i went to a dermatologist to ask about treatments. They said they don’t usually do it on such a broad area as someone’s back, and he told me honestly that it would probably make very little difference considering the cost of the treatment.
I’ve been seeing a lot of simple dresses jazzed up with beautiful lace boleros… and I LOVE THEM. But of course, I discovered these after I chose a dress that has detailing at the top…
I LOVE my dress, and have no desire to get a new dress just for the sake of a bolero, but I wanted to see if you guys think I could pull off a bolero with it. So here’s my dress! It’s Organza, if that matters..
And here’s the detail at the top:
If you have any ideas of a bolero that COULD go with it, please share!
Here’s an example of a bolero I was thinking of…
Post # 3
IMO if your okay with it dont cover up that beautiful dress. your gonna look sooo gorgeous it wont be noticed if anything wear ur hair down similar to th model
Post # 4
I voted to just try something small and cap sleeved. In the end, it’s really completely up to your comfort level. Your guests will likely not even notice. But if you are concerned, then maybe check out Etsy – there’s quite a few nice lace boleros on there.
When I met my now Darling Husband, I was very self conscious about scars on my back too. I’ve had quite a few biopsies due to possible skin cancer, which have left their mark. He made me feel beautiful and completely forget about them. I did, and my dress had a key hole back on our wedding day. No one made mention of those scars at all. I only noticed them in one wedding pic, which was of my Mom doing up the back of my dress for me. Other than that, it was like the scars aren’t even there.
Post # 5
There are a number of ‘matching’ bolero jackets to go with your dress available, although I don’t think a lace one is what you’d want. Stick with the same fabric as your dress and it will look amazing!
Post # 6
@anothersmith: How do I find matching boleros to go with my dress?? I’d love to find a matching one!
Post # 7
I say forget your aunt. You feel comfortable, don’t let her bring you down. It’s your day and they wont be looking at your back. Have you considered tanning? If it’s upsetting to you perhaps a fake air brush tan before the wedding? Tanning helps cover scars
Post # 8
I have a huge scar on the top of my left arm after I got scalded with coffee when I was 2.
No one ever notices it, and the only people who mention it are people I’ve known a long time (and so know about it because it’s come up in conversation). I was asked if I’d get a dress that hid mine, and they seemed shocked when I looked at them like they were crazy!
In my opinion, you shouldn’t cover it up. It’s a part of who you are and it’s something that’s important in your relationship. If your Fiance has helped develop your confidence around your scars, then you show the world just how confident he’s made you.
Your Fiance sounds wonderful and that is a gorgeous dress!
ETA: you need a “NO! Be yourself!” option in the poll 🙂
Post # 9
Why don’t you just wear your hair down? I feel like a bolero would take away from the neckline and detailing. If you’re worried about the scars appearing in getting-ready pictures, speak to your photographer. They should be able to work around that fairly easily.
Post # 10
@anothersmith: There are some on Etsy, and some on other bridal sites. Perhaps go to wherever you got your dress?
Post # 11
Nah, I wouldn’t. Do you have long hair? You could wear it down. And your veil will cover your back during the ceremony which is when people would most notice.
Post # 12
I wouldn’t. Be confident and don’t give that scar a second thought.
Post # 13
@lovelove1028: You might contact the manufacturer of your dress and see if you can get a couple yards of the fabric to bring to a seamstress/tailor who can create a custom bolero for you. You can bring a photo of a shape of a bolero you like as a reference. Good luck!
EDIT: My Maid/Matron of Honor did this for her dress and it came out beautifully.