Scheduling bridal shower and bachelorette

posted 3 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@pinotgrigio:  If it makes you feel any better, I’m stressing about the exact same things!  My wedding is in June and I think my parties will be in late April and early May, but the fact that I don’t know certain dates yet is driving me insane!  I NEED to write this in my planner!  Haha

Post # 4
Member
609 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

My BMs scheduled my shower for the Saturday a week before my wedding. I’m not having a bachelorette party, so I think that helped.

Post # 5
Member
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

It’s way too early, and I wouldn’t ask. i know this is not the answer you want to hear, but honestly, just live your life and make plans like normal (surely you wont literally book yourself up EVERY single weekend between now and your wedding). Pushing your bridal party for plans — even if it’s just so you can mark your calendar – will come off as presumptuous and entitled at worst, and overzealous at best. This stuff should really be entirely on their own initiative with no prompting from you.

Don’t worry, it’ll work out one way or the other. You may even have to decline attending your second cousin’s third birthday party or whatever in order to make your own shower. 

Post # 7
Member
476 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

You should talk to your bridal party and decide what dates work! The sooner the better, it gives everyone time to plan 🙂

Post # 8
Member
5432 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada ♥ EDD- April 2016

My bachelorette was December 28th, because one of my bridesmaids lives about 16+ hours away for school and she was home for the holidays. She really wanted to help plan it with another one of my bridesmaids so we did it super early (my wedding is in June). My shower is planned for May 3rd. Not really sure if that helps at all.. I’m also totally type A and really need to plan/organize things, but I think I would probably wait until February or even early March to ask them about dates unless they bring it up.

ETA: If you’re finding that your weekends are filling up way too fast and it seems like it will limit your shower options then I would bring it up sooner rather than later (:

 

Post # 9
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@pinotgrigio:  I kind of disagree with the PP that said not to mention anything. I got together with 2 of my bridesmaids and one of the girls that will be attending my bachelorette party and we looked at the calendar and picked a weekend. Then I texted my other two bridesmaids (who live out of state) to check the weekend with them and that was how we picked the date.

I’m type A too and have a good number of friends getting married around the same time as I am, so my weekends were getting booked up quickly and I wanted to just get something on the calendar. I don’t think it’s over-stepping boundaries, and none of my maids seemed to be upset about me starting the discussion either.

FWIW – my bridal shower is the second weekend in March, my bachelorette the first weekend in April, and I’m getting married the first weekend in May. 

Post # 10
Hostess
8680 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

It’s not planned as of yet, but both will be scheduled well in advance. We all have busy lives and it’s easier for us to coordinate if we pick dates early on.

The shower will be about 1 month out, and the bachlorette about 2 weeks out.

Post # 11
Member
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@pinotgrigio:  I feel the same way, I want and have mentioned to my bridesmaids that I want to know when the shower is, but they seem to want to surprise me, which is slightly frustrating because I also work weekends so hopefully they hint or tell me, so I can get the day off, or they talk to my boss.

Post # 12
Member
5012 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@pinotgrigio:  I disagree with people telling you to wait. We already have the dates planned for my bachelorette party, and believe it or not, it is HARD to coordinate 8-9 women who all have their own lives going on, especially in the summer. I would ask your MOH to see if you can at least get a date down (we changed ours 2-3 times before everyone could agree) for it. No need for details, etc. but then people will know and block off that weekend for you! 

Post # 13
mscloverBee
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - Fourth Presbyterian Church, Chicago, IL & Cheney Mansion, Oak Park, IL

@pinotgrigio:  I’d check with your maid of honor and she can get the ball rolling if you’re concerned about schedules filling up. I’m getting married in June and my shower and bachelorette were picked in August, because they were the times MOH Sis would be able to fly in for them. Stepmom’s shower was scheduled in December, and its a good thing, because I have something basically every weekend for six weeks (THREE weddings in May).

Post # 15
Member
767 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

@pinotgrigio:  shower is in march and party is the weekend before the wedding (june)

Post # 16
Member
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@pinotgrigio:  I wouldn’t worry about it too much, My MOH (sister) asked me for a guest list for both the shower (last week), and bachorette party (today). One of the bridesmaids secretly shared what dates they are thinking for them with me today, after I pointed out that I would like to know so I can make sure I can get the day off from work, feeling relieved that I know the dates, and trusting that my maids won’t do anything too craxy.

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