Post # 1
My Fiance and I have been engaged for several years and haven’t planned the wedding for a variety of reasons. I was hoping that we could finally plan everything for 2012.
However, FI’s cousin just got engaged and is planning for a wedding in late September or October 2012. Alot of their family is out of state so they are asking around to see who thinks they could make it before coming up with a guest list.
My etiquette question: would it be completely rude or in poor taste to also plan a wedding for 2012? Some of the same relatives may also attend ours and would have to travel for both weddings from out of state (FL to PA, etc). If so, we would try to keep ours in the spring time (April to June, perhaps July). Ours will be a much more low-key affair, theirs is a big city, glamourous event (I’m guessing). I don’t want to take anything away from them (but I really don’t want to wait until 2013 either). Ideas?
Post # 3
I don’t think it’s in poor taste at all – you’ve been waiting a long time!
After Fiance and I got engaged and announced our October 2011 date, THREE of his cousins set their wedding dates for this year: June, September and November. I was kinda like, “really!?” but I’m not terribly bothered by it.
Post # 4
Nope. They don’t get a whole year, or even a season. There’s always going to be SOMEONE with a conflict. Make sure the MOST important people to you can make it on the date you pick, then just roll with it.
Post # 5
I think it’s hard to say that it’s rude to plan your wedding in the same year! If you planned it like two weeks before/after, that might make it hard for guests to attend. You’re absolutely not stealing their thunder if you get married in the same year, I’ve noticed that a lot of my cousins/second cousins/my brother have gotten married lately and it has a lot to do with the fact that our generation is going through that part of life.
Having people to plan weddings at the same time is fun!!
Post # 6
Definitely not rude. They don’t get a whole year.
Post # 7
Thats not poor taste you dont have to change your timeline because of someone elses.
Post # 8
After we got engaged, we heard about one of FI’s cousins that got engaged before us. Then another cousin got engaged after us. (Both siblings actually, should be fun for that family.) We’re all planning weddings next year and it’s possible FI’s brother will get engaged and have his next year too. No way I’m going to change my timing – Fiance has so many cousins that if you did that you’d be waiting for a long while if you waited for one a year. I know some on this board argue for 3 months in either direction, but from my perspective, it’s just one day/weekend you get.
Post # 10
It would only be rude if you planned it right around the same time as their wedding (like if theirs was for May 10 and you planned yours for May 20).
We got married in June; I had cousins get married in March and May, and SO has cousins getting married in August and December. We were engaged before all of them, but I wasn’t offended at all.
Please don’t wait until 2013 because you don’t want to step on toes; you aren’t being rude at all! 🙂