Post # 1
I need some advice/thoughts on the seating chart. I have to get this done soon (I feel like we have even less time with Thanksgiving looming!). Are there any conventions around seating (other than family being up at the front) that I need to keep in mind here? Does anyone know whether there is an etiquette regarding who sits where that I should absolutely follow? We have to have assigned seats for dinner since people ordered specific entree choices, but I really don’t want people to feel like they were stack ranked according to “importance” as guests and that their seating was determined accordingly.
Any advice is much appreciated. Thank you in advance!
Post # 3
No formal rules that I know of. We had tables of 8-9 people and just tried to put at least a few at each table who knew each other (IE 2 coworkers of DH were sitting with 2 other coworkers that they knew. Then we wanted people to mingle so we’d then put my coworkers or people from either family at the same table)
Post # 4
@coffeeloverbee: I used those little post-it flags to make my seating chart. There are 5-6 different colors in each pack. I color-coded “like” types of guests (Family, Friends, Dad’s co-workers, Boy Scout people, church people, co-workers). I tried to keep the same groups more or less together. It worked pretty well, considering there were a few people who overlapped into several different groups. I used a large piece of poster board and drew up the layout of our reception hall. I got everyone’s PostIt in the general area, then from there it was easy to rearrange. Making it a visual chart instead of a list made life MUCH easier.
Post # 5
I don’t have very concrete advice beyond try not to stress over it. I worried about all sorts of issues 2-3 months ago as we made our table assignments — we needed four tables for all of our parents but the venue only had space for three tables up front, should we seat our wedding party closer to the front or behind family, etc. — and I assure you that whatever you do it will be okay. I agree that it feels a lot like ranking your guests by importance, but as long as you place your parents up front no one has any reason to be offended with where they are sitting. I don’t think most guests notice these things anyhow as long as they are seated with people they know.
I’ve known some couples to seat older guests further from the dance floor and speakers, but that is more of a courtesy than a point of ettiquette.
Post # 6
@nanilani04: Thank you so much for saying that! I have actually heard stories of people being offedned by where they were seated. I really don’t want to offend anyone! That’s where this worrying is coming from, so your comment is much appreciated!
Post # 7
@coffeeloverbee: You know your own family dynamic, so if there’s someone who needs to be treated with kid gloves and it doesn’t make your life too difficult, then it may be worth it to accomodate them. But don’t let other people’s crazy ruin your enjoyment of the reception. I think most people won’t be that concerned.
I was never 100% happy with our seating chart, but eventually we had to deem it good enough since there was no perfect solution. The only complaint we heard (in jest) was from my college-aged cousin whom we sat with his older siblings and some aunts and uncles — he joked about not being assigned to the “kids” table (which was full).