Seating of dad's girlfriend? (sort of vent/long)

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@lolita39:  If dad is divorced rom mom then mom sits in the front row with the immediate family and dad sits in the second row with his girlfriend.  She’s 23.  Everyone will know exactly what she is to you and your family (dad’s child mistress), and if not, the less you stress out about it, the less anyone else will care about who she is.

Have the usher seat her before the official entrance of your mom (i.e. before the processional music starts.)  If she has a problem with that and your dad refuses to attend as a result then that’s his decision which sucks but a real man wouldn’t let his girlfriend abuse his family the way he does.

Post # 5
Member
3693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I wouldn’t worry about the rehearsal. My husband was the best man in a wedding last year, and I wasn’t in the bridal party. I was of course invited to the rehearsal dinner, so I came along and sat and watched the rehearsal. It wasn’t that awkward because I was friends with the bride and groom, but I didn’t get in the way and it wasn’t a big deal.

Post # 6
Member
4760 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Talk about awkward! 

It is indeed strange that she spends her time hiding from your fam and then wants to go to the rehersal dinner and wedding.  I’d think she wouldn’t show.

I’m sorry you have to deal with this.  

Post # 7
Member
1254 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Ugh I want to vomit for you!

I also thinks it’s pathetic your dad wouldn’t attend your wedding unless he can parade around his girl (emphasis on girl) friend

Post # 8
Member
7285 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

She has no role but to sit there and shut her mouth. If she dared to make fuss or if dad makes a fuss, peronally…they could both kick rocks. This is about YOU!

Post # 9
Member
1931 posts
Buzzing bee

You’re a far better person than I for even inviting her.

Post # 12
Member
1931 posts
Buzzing bee

@lolita39:  I’d stick her at her own table in the corner at the reception, lol. With a placecard marked “Bitch”. 

Post # 13
Member
6510 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

I really don’t have any useful advice because I’m not sure how I would handle this situation. I just wanted to let you know how awesome it is that you are going through this to make your grandma happy.

Post # 15
Member
5966 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

@lolita39:  im sorry but that is where I draw the line. I would not allow this person to sit in the “honor” seats. Screw that. I unerstand you are doing what you can to make your grandma happy but I would honestly have to just really put my foot down about that last one. Rehearsal dinner? whatever. if she wants to come, let her come, I would ignore her and move on. But there is no way in hell my father’s mistress (child mistress btw) would be sitting front or even second or third row with my real family. Im not nearly as nice as you about this kind of thing. I would definitely tell my dad he needs to realize that his actions are the cause for such an awkward situation and that he can deal with the consequences but that he will not be making my wedding day awkward with this nonsense. If it were me, I would think my feelings should come before the feelings of this mistress (at least on my damn wedding day).

Post # 16
Member
9533 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Don’t worry about the rehearsal. Lots of rehearsals have stragglers that are SOs of people involved in the wedding. They can sit and watch. No big deal. For the service, I like the solution of putting her and your dad in the second row. She doesn’t need to be escorted. She can be seated just like any other guest, but she goes to a specific seat which is second from the middle in the second row. Then your dad can sit next to her, on the aisle, after her walks you in. And kudos to you for trying to handle this with some class. I can’t even imagine…

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