Post # 1
i really need some help and advice on how to sort out seating for my top table.
i dont want my dad sitting on the top table with me. he isnt walking me down the ailse and i just dont want me sat with me wither, for years since he married his current partner, i have always felt likr the ‘outsider’ and i just dont have that bond with him.
on the other hand i dont want him to feel like he has been pushed out as i am his only biological daughter ( not that i give 2 stuffs about him and his feelings, but its the family politics and my dads mothers feeling i dont want to hurt etc )
anyway, i had this sorted because my mother and her partner and his mother and partner are helping financially with the wedding, so they would be sat at the top table and both mine and his dad’s plus their partners would be sat on a different table. untill his dad also said he wanted to contribute to the wedding. so now i dont want to make his dad feel out of place and not sat with us, but then on the other hand, my dad is only coming as a guest and i dont see why he should be sat anywhere other than with the other guests. but then again i dont want it to look strange that he is the only parent not on the top table.
i dont know, im just so confused and dont know what to do! can any one offer any advise? if anyone can understand what im rambling on about!!
Post # 3
I’m not going to be any help at all…
Because your situation is just about the same as mine. The only difference is that I “bit the bullet” and am letting him walk me down the aisle. Through I regret that decision now.
Hopefully someone can come in with sage advice, but know that there is another bride out there with a loving mother and in-laws… and a very problematic father.
Post # 4
i so feel for you, its just horrible! just dont know what to do, or how to tackle it.
im here if you need a chat, if our situations are similar i might be able to have an understanding of what your going through.
Post # 5
I say do what makes you comfortable. Most of the weddings i’ve been too people only sit in their seats for dinner anyway. I’m assuming more of your family knows you’re not super close if this has been going on for awhile so would they really make a fuss out of it?
Post # 6
I would eliminate the top table idea. Just do a sweetheart, and seat your mom, her husband and your Mother-In-Law and her husband at one table (maybe with your grandparents) and then seat the dads at another table with their parents. This is my plan as my father and I do not have a tight bond (he is not walking me down the aisle either. I am also DREADING the father-daughter dance).
Post # 7
i dont really like the sweetheart tables, i want to be sat with other people and be able to have a giggle with them. Plus i want to recognise my mum and my partners parents, and by not having them sit with us, i just feel it wont be as special for them.
i dont know! what ever i do is going to upset someone.
im not having a father daughter dance. no way! i am thinking of having a dance with my mum and grandma, by having my grandads favourtie song played for us to dance to as a way of remembering him on my day (the song is Tina Turner – Simply the Best, not one that would be sad and down beat for the other guests)
if i could have one wish it would be for my grandad to walk me down the aisle, but he died 7 years ago. by doing this i can remember him in my own way on our wedding day.
when i was a little girl i never thought it would be this difficult to marry the man of my dreams!
Post # 8
We’re doing a no family top table. Just us bridesmaids and best men. then two round ‘family tables’ at the front, closest to the top table, and everyone else back there. Its such a relief that all the families agreed that this was best
And if you need a little chinwag, message me. I’m in the UK too xx
Post # 9
That sounds like a good idea. Pleased it has worked out for you!
and thank you for the offer, you may well regret it though!! x
Post # 10
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
We’re also not sitting with our family- our bridal party and their spouses will sit with us, and the parents (mine are divorced) all get their own tables. Everybody’s happy that way! 🙂