Post # 1
My fiance and I are having our wedding ceremony at our church with a cake/dessert reception immediately following at the church as well. The ceremony is at 1pm, and we’re looking to be done with the cake reception around 330 or 4ish. At this ceremony and reception will be around 250 guests, pretty much everyone we know. We are also having a smaller, dinner and dancing reception at a restaurant at 5 o’clock the same day with only 100-ish people invited. The people who are coming to the dinner/dancing reception will have also been at the ceremony and cake reception, they are just additionally being invited to this other, smaller one. We decided to send out the same ceremony invitation to everyone, all 250ish people, that invites them to the ceremony and says there will be a cake reception immediately following. Our idea was to send another little invitation card along with the ceremony one to only the 100 people that will be at the second reception. My problem is, I don’t know how to word those invitations to let them know that it is an additional reception and not everyone is invited, so to keep it kind of on the down-low. Any suggestions?
Post # 3
This sounds like a recipe for disaster! I can promise you that everyone will find out- these things have a way of getting around- and many will likely be offended. Even having the smaller reception on a different day would go a long way towards making it less offensive. Is that an option?
Post # 4
Yea, I vote for different day, or much later at night. There is only one hour inbetween the big reception and small reception. It seems like there should be 3 hours at least so people who linger won’t find out they weren’t invited to the other one. I’m not sure how you should word the invitation if you decide to do so. Something along the lines of, “You’re invited to a special reception for close family and friends at 5pm”. I don’t think it’s fair to tell them to keep it on the down-low… you are the one who didn’t invite the rest of the people. You have to take responsibility if/when they find out that they’re not invited. It shouldn’t be a big deal, just let them know it’s a special reception for family and friends.
Post # 5
maybe word it like.. “you are invited to continue the celebration during a private ceremony for close friends and family…”
i’m not sure if that’s along the lines of what your looking for! i’m in a similar situation as you, but in the end my fiance and i decided it was better to have the reception on a different day!
maybe try to be more honest about it rather than keep it on the DL… we chose a venue that was smaller than we had hoped for but eveything else was perfect… I’ve just been saying “i would love to be able to invite you but i have a huge family” and i’ve had only one or two bad responces to that… and i really think that for people to flip out about it is selfish on their part! it’s your day!