(Closed) Second Shift Spouse

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
358 posts
Helper bee

We make fun plans and do stuff on our days off to reconnect.  It used to bother me not seeing each other often but honestly it’s just real life.  To be able to come through spending time apart still strong and in love is a good lesson as many times in life will be like that.  Also we have our whole lives so theirs no pressure if we don’t do something fun everyday, if I want to go to bed early that’s fine which helps take the stress off.

Post # 4
Member
4243 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

DH works til 8 pm, so we see each other, but we also go to bed around 10-10:30, so it’s not much time. We just really treasure our time together – for instance, we both have Sunday off (he works Saturdays), so we make sure we spend Sundays together.

I know a couple who did a cute thing -she worked days and he worked nights. They set up a Scrabble board and she would play a word in the evening after work and then the next morning, he would play a word. It was just a little thing, but it was a fun way to “play” together even though they didn’t see each other much.

Post # 5
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My husband was on the evening shift for two months, they switch every two months to a new shift. It SUCCCKKKEED. We barely saw each other and I was super sick of it.

My only suggestion is to stay up late and he gets up early. I also went hom for lunch so I got to see him for 30 minutes. It was rough.

 

Post # 6
Member
9693 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@MercyK:  I am very new to this lifestyle. My FI has just started a rotating shift job, so there are weeks I see him all the day (even more than I usually would) and then weeks where I barely see him and it’s awful. All I can do is stay busy so that I don’t dwell on how much our (temporary) situation sucks. He is actively looking for something else, and I am even willing to move again if he finds something. I am not going to sugarcoat how much I hate it, but I know a lot of ladies are able to deal with it a lot better than I am :-

Post # 7
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@LadyBear:  That scrabble idea is super cute! I might have to do that!

Post # 8
Member
255 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This is the one reason I don’t want to leave my current job…we both work 8-5 jobs with weekends off and I love having that extra time with him!!

Post # 9
Member
917 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@MercyK:  Sometimes I’ll stay up and wait for him so we can have late dinner together and hang out, but it’s hard because then it throws off my sleeping schedule.

Other times I go to bed early and we see if I wake up when he gets home.

Post # 10
Member
9057 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

Like you mentioned, I’ll sometimes go to bed early or have a nap when I get home from work so I can wake up and visit a bit when he gets home.  I work 8-4 Mon-Fri and he works Wed-Sat 12-10pm (and we have an hour commute and often he works OT on Sundays).  We do work at the same place though, so sometimes we’ll have lunch together around 11am, or dinner together when I get off shift if we can swing it. 

We just try to make sure we plan to do something together on the one day off we get every couple weeks and try to do date nights on Monday/Tuesday nights.

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