Post # 1
I have a very minor problem I am trying to work out. We had a small destination wedding (15 people, all family), and are having a reception this summer at home to celebrate with extended family and friends. I sent the Save-the-Date cards along with our wedding announcement a few weeks after we returned from our honeymoon. The actual invitiations won’t go out until early May. In the past few weeks, I have had a few people contact me directly to say they unfortunately have a conflict and cannot attend for whatever reason, and I really do appreciate the early notification.
But do I send these people an invitation? The proper etiquette angel tells me to send it anyway, since they are invited, but the practical angel tells me that they already declined, so why bother them and ask for another RSVP? Can anyone tell me what they did?
Post # 3
I haven’t had this come up yet BUT if I did, I wouldn’t send an invitation.
Post # 4
@Phantom: I sent them anyway for the most part. It kind of depended on who the person was.
Post # 5
I sent invites to everyone who was on the invited list no matter what.
Post # 6
I didnt send out Save-The-Date Cards but I did send invites to 2 couples that are out of state and I know they cant make it. I just did it to be nice and I knew they would like to received an invite. But in your case i dont think you have to send them an invite
Post # 7
When asking for addresses (for STDs) people said they couldn’t come… so I didn’t send them an STD. But I haven’t heard anyone say after receiving the STD if they can come or not. If I were you I would still send one, unless it’s a real problem with money issues and/or too many people on the guest list already.
Post # 8
I probably would just to be nice i guess and make sure they don’t think that just because they can’t come i don’t care about them anymore. And who knows, maybe things will change and they’ll be able to come afterall!! I have a friend who i don’t see often and she’s already told me she can’t come but I’m still going to send her an invite to let her know i’m still thinking of her.
Post # 9
I would send invites to everyone on my list, unless they have already declined for whatever reason. They informed you so you could save the money that you would have spent on them (thank god for guests like this!) and that includes the invite. Just send it to someone else 🙂
Post # 10
Anyone who is sent a STD must receive an invite. They may have a change in their schedule and be able to attend after all.
Post # 11
I had two people who are definitely not coming (one is going to be in Germany, the other at a conference). I know beyond a shadow of a doubt they will not come, so I won’t be sending them an RSVP. A few other people have been like “Well… we’ll see, I’m not sure what I have going on.” Those people I am sending an invitation to. But honestly, if someone was like “Dude, I’m sorry, but I cannot come” then I wouldn’t send an invitation.
Post # 12
It depends. I sent invites to people who said they wouldn’t be able to make it, but I didn’t send an invite to people who didn’t even bother to give me their address (even after I asked for it TWICE).
Post # 13
@Phantom: I have a few elderly family members, who won’t be able to travel for the wedding because of health issues. Despite that, I’m sending them invitations so they know I am thinking of them. Also, I have a few friends who have scheduling problems and have told me they can’t come, but I’m still sending them invitations because, as a few have pointed out, things may change. If it’s a huge sum of people which would make a significant difference in the cost of the invitations, that’s something to consider. But if it’s an extra five invites to send out, I’d go ahead and send them.