Sending a thank you to the most TERRIBLE BRIDESMAID…What to do?

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: So, what should I do?
    Send the FU : (1 votes)
    3 %
    Thank her for the amp, but nothing else : (32 votes)
    80 %
    Don't send anything : (7 votes)
    18 %
    CALL HER AND TELL HER THE F OFF TO HER FACE (ears?)!!!! : (0 votes)
  • Post # 2
    Member
    4483 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Be the bigger person and send a polite note, but then distance yourself, which shouldn’t be a problem since she’s a flake.

    Post # 3
    Member
    1893 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Dallas, TX

    Wakonyo21:  Well, it’s clear, and you seem to know this as well, that you never should have asked her in the first place. It doesn’t sound like you are interested in maintaining a friendship. If that is the case, I would write her a short generic thank you note, “Thank you so much for being a part of our special day” or something like that, and then not initiate contact. If you want to continue a friendship or having her in your lives, call her and tell her how you feel. Personally, she doesn’t sound like someone I would be interested in encouraging to be a part of my life.

    Post # 4
    Member
    6273 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    thank you for sharing our special day, we were glad you were able to celebrate with us.

    Post # 5
    Member
    649 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Wakonyo21:  she sounds a hot mess, but who knows what’s going on in her life. I wouldn’t send anything nasty to her. Just keep it short and sweet like.

    Dear ” ,  thank you for being a part of our big day! Best of luck with your pregnancy. Regards,Wakonyo

    thats what I would do…

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    8016 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2015

    I would thank her for her contribution anyway then just distance yourself. Respond to her future messages with vague nicities. 

    The hard cold truth here is that the scenario is…. pretty much entirely your fault for asking someone *youve never met* to be a bridesmaid… that has “terrible idea” written all over it (as you now know). Live and learn!

    Post # 8
    Member
    558 posts
    Busy bee

    Wakonyo21:  I would follow the advice given and just thank her, after that you have done your bit. Be the better person. Just a quick question, is she married or with someone (the father of the child)?

    Post # 10
    Member
    5 posts
    Newbee

    Thank her for the “effort” made to make your day special!!!

    Effort does not always include follow thru or results, assume it was the thought that counts and let her negotiate her own short-comings.

    Post # 10
    Member
    4596 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Just keep it simple. I like some of what other PP’s have posted.

    Post # 11
    Member
    389 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2014 - Norton Country Club

    I voted “thank her for the amp” because it was closest to what I was thinking… maybe something like, “Dear Bridesmaid’sName,

    Thank you for being with us to celebrate our day.  The extra favor of you bringing that amp really meant a lot to us and saved our ceremony music.  Hubby and I really look forward to seeing pictures o your little one!

    with our thanks,

    Wakonyo and Hubby”

    Post # 13
    Member
    2368 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I’d look at this as a lesson learned, send a nice card and be done with her. Be polite and short “Thank you for being with us on our special day. We really appreciate the help with the amp, and we were glad to have you there with us.”

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