Post # 1
Okay here it is… I don’t like the style of my engagement ring, there I said it.
Its a beautiful ring with a near perfect diamond and FI spent a pretty penny on it. I cried when we got engaged and I couldn’t be happier to spend my life with him.
There is nothing wrong with it at all other than the fact that its just not the style I had dreamed about.
Heres my question, have any bees exchanged their engagement ring?
I’ve been wearing my ring for about 8 months now and I was hoping that it would grow on me but it just hasn’t.
I want to talk to FI about it but I don’t want to hurt his feeling or make him think I want a bigger rock something like that. In fact the ring that I love comes in a bridal set so it wouldn’t cost him anymore money at all.
Has anyone changed their engagement ring that FI picked out?
for reference here is my ering:
and this is the set I love:
Post # 2
FutureMrsKenward: Oh no, bummer!! I picked my own so I hope to love it (never tried it on!). Can you keep the stone and put it into the setting like you like?? That way you’re not losing money on the stone…
Post # 3
I think it’s really hard to tell him after eight months that you’ve been lying and don’t like the ring he chose. Plus, if there was a return policy for exchanging it, you’ve likely missed that window.
Perhaps you can save up and make your ring into a halo down the line? Or upgrade on an anniversary to another ring? I just think there are going to be more hurt feelings from the deception than there would have been from just telling him outright eight months ago.
Post # 4
Hmm, I think I would have it reset on an anniversary. I think it would be hard to explain now why you want to exchange. If you love halo, there are pretty princess halos you can go later on.
I am sure glad my FI and I picked my ring together. I feel like the woman should have a say in comething she has to wear every day for the rest of her life.
Until you can get it reset, just try to enjoy it for what it is. A symbol of his love for you.
Post # 5
I’ve already checked with the store and they can exchange it and the difference would be the same amount of buying a wedding band…
I really shouldn’t have let to go this long.. like I said I thought I would grow to love it but everytime I look at its just meh… most days I leave it at home in my jewelry box and I just think its a waste to spend so much money on a ring that I just kinda like. I feel like all the woman I know gush and show off their rings and I just put my hand in my pocket 🙁
Post # 6
Another thing that I cannot find a ring that sits flush against it and I really don’t like having a gap… so after the wedding I’ll just end up wearing my wedding band alone.. which again seems like a waste of money to just sit in a box
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2013 - Little White Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas
I think it’s beautiful. Sorry you don’t like it much. My husband asked what I wanted in a ring but he ultimately picked it out. I’m pretty sure he would have had his feelings hurt had I expressed any kind of disapointment at all. Would you rather ask him to change it now or wait to ask for an anniversary upgrade? Does he know you don’t wear it? How does he feel about that?
Post # 8
Are you sure you haven’t missed the deadline to exchange it? If you’re not going to lose money, I would go for it. This is a ring you’re going to be wearing the rest of your life. You don’t want to swallow a little regret every time you see it, you want to smile and give your husband a kiss! It will hurt his feelings a little bit, no way around that, but let your gratitude and happiness make up for it.
Post # 9
I’ve never really asked him about and upgrade later on.. thats and interesting idea..
He’s never said anything to me about not wearing it. I make sure its on when we do things together.. I just take it off for work or when I’m home.
Post # 11
canadajane: Thats what I keep thinking is that I want to look down and not being to stop smiling.. right now I look at it and think “its okay” makes me sad 🙁
Post # 10
FutureMrsKenward: I couldn’t ever imagine parting with the ring FI gave to me when he proposed. No matter what style. I think he’d be very hurt.
Post # 12
FutureMrsKenward: Your ring is pretty.. But, if you don’t love it, you are gonna hate to wear it much. You already said you leave it in the jewelry box most of the time. If you aren’t gonna lose any or much money, I would exchange it for the set you want for sure! Just, be positive that is the set you love..
When you discuss it with your FI, be sensitive to his feelings. Just tell him, while it is a beautiful ring, it just isn’t the style you always dreamt of. And, you really thought after time you would love it, but you still are dreaming of that other set… He will be okay I am sure. Most men just want us to be happy!!!!
Keep us posted what he says.
Post # 13
Just tell him not that you don’t like it – I would rather say that you want to “jazz it up a bit” – especially with the option of not losing any money. I don’t know, but I don’t think men tend to to take the news as badly as we’d think? I mean, personally, I don’t think my fiance would’ve minded (but then again, he insisted I pick out the ring, because he wanted to get exactly what I wanted).
Post # 14
FutureMrsKenward: I guess I am of a different opinion from most people who have posted thus far.
I think that you should LOVE your e-ring. and your FI should want you to LOVE your e-ring. You need to be proud of it.
Sometimes girls are disappointed in the size of their diamond or the price that was spent on their e-ring, and that comes across as ungrateful and bratty. You, however, are not asking for a larger diamond or more money spent. You are just asking for a style difference. There is nothing wrong with that!
I’m sure if your FI knew how you felt, he would be sad. Guys want their girl to be proud of their ring and to show it off. I know what you mean about gaps and trying to find an e-ring that fits flat against it. I changed what e-ring i wanted based on that alone, and FI was more than happy to go back and exchange the ring (this was before he proposed though, I didn’t know that he had already bought a ring…he took me to the store to try on rings and i tried on the one he had bought -i had no idea- and decided i didn’t like it bc there would be gaps….he went back the next day and exchanged it for a diff ring. because he wants me to have one that i love!! I didnt know any of this until after the proposal though).
If you got your FI something that he didn’t love love, wouldn’t you want him to change it for something that he would be proud of and love?
Especially since what you want is the same price, I think you should sit your FI down and gently tell him how you feel. Go for it. Be gentle – make sure that he knows that you love HIM and you LOVED the proposal and that you aren’t rejecting him or his gift. You are planning on spending the rest of your life with this guy, you need to be able to communicate your feelings. If you have to lie to him about liking the e-ring, that’s not a great start to anything! that’s why i don’t understand why so many girls lie about liking their e-ring when they really dont.
The longer you let it go, the harder it will become…..
Post # 15
FutureMrsKenward: If it’s not too late to exchange, I would exchange it. You want to love it, not feel like, “damn, I wish I had something different.” I agree with Bexx: I would want him to exchange it and be happy with it, and I’m sure he would want you to be happy with it.