Post # 1
We’re not having a large amount of heavy drinkers at our wedding–I can probably name 10 of 120 guests. Neither my mother’s side of the family or my father’s side (with at least 2 recovering alcoholics) are drinkers. So, FI and I thought it would make a lot of sense to only offer a selection of beers and wines at our open bar, as that’s what the majority of people we know like to drink, and it would cut down on our bar tab.
Good idea, right? Apparently not, according to my mom, because an “open bar is only truly an open bar when it’s free everything!” Apparently it would be extremely rude to not allow those few individuals their screwdrivers or rum and cokes.
So, what do you think? Would you be put off if you attended an open bar wedding and were only offered unlimited beer and wine? Or would you not care either way?
Post # 3
@MrsRevolutionize: i don’t think it’s rude at all. it’s your wedding and you know your guests. i would be fine drinking wine all night but i personally know a few people who don’t drink either wine or beer. for them it might not be great. i think if you can afford a truly open bar, that’s always my preference. but if you’re on a budget, wine & beer is fine IMO
Post # 4
I think beer and wine is fine! We had an open bar and the idiot who was our bartender was charging everyone for drinks until my FIL noticed and told him we paid for an open bar! Honestly though lots of people were drinking beer and wine. We had a lot of 20s and 30s aged people who were ordering mixed drinks but if most of your gusets don’t drink then go with the cheaper option!
Post # 5
Etiquette Snob here… lol
The Host gets to decide what kind of party they wish to have… and that includes if there will be alcohol served… what kind and how much.
So there is absolutely NOTHING WRONG with any of the following (singularily or in a combo):
- A Dry Wedding
- Cocktail Hour Only
- Wine with Dinner
- Beer & Wine Only
- A White Bar – White Items Only (ie Gin – Rum – Vodka – White Wine)
- or an Open Bar
And if you live in an area where Co-Hosted Bars are the norm… (such as a Loonie or Twoonie Bar) then those are socially ok to.
FULLY Open Bars are very expensive, and indeed prohibitive in some places… which is why there are so many acceptable alternatives.
Hope this helps,
Post # 6
@MrsRevolutionize: I don’t think it’s rude, but then again I don’t drink (sparkling cider for me lol). If the majority of your guests aren’t drinkers, I doubt anyone will miss it. That being said, we did opt for a full open bar because we knew our guests drink fairly heavily.
Post # 7
I think it’s a generational thing!
My parents were HORRIFIED to discover that we were serving Mimosas instead of a full open bar, but eveyone around our age (20-35) thought it was fine! Especially since it was like 1pm…
Post # 8
@MrsRevolutionize: I would not care either way. DH’s friends are BIG drinkers, but drink mostly beer. Honestly – you are probably better off with just beer and wine b/c the minute my DH and his friends do shots on top of beer, I know there will be a big mess to clean up. 🙁 With the wine, you could also look into the possibility of making wine spritzers with the wine – that could be a nice touch for the ladies – I know I would take one!
Post # 9
@MrsRevolutionize: Beer and Wine only is absolutely acceptable. It’s free, lets not get too picky right?
Due to insurance reasons we weren’t allowed to have hard alcohol at our wedding, that may be a restriction for you as well.
Post # 10
@MrsRevolutionize: When I go out to eat, I expect to drink wine. I don’t care if it’s offered to me or if I have to buy it/bring it, but I’m drinking wine, not vodka or rhum. I would certainly not pay for a full open bar to satisfy 10 out of 120 people, knowing how expensive alcohol is where I live.
Post # 11
Free booze is free booze. If it were just beer, I’d be offended, but since there’s wine also, I’d be perfectly happy!
Post # 12
Thanks, everyone! I appreciate your input 🙂
@This Time Round: Thank you for the advice!!! Co-hosted bars aren’t that prevalent in Manitoba. I think open bars are generally the rule of thumb here, and my mom associates it with the high Ukrainian population, for one reason or another? And I had never heard of a white bar! Very interesting.
@BrandNewBride: Oh my, a mimosa bar sounds increeeeedible!!
@MrsNewDay: I hadn’t thought of that, but your spritzer idea is wonderful! I’ll definitely keep that in mind 🙂
Post # 13
We did beer and wine only, and it worked out great. Also had champagne for the toast.
Post # 14
We had a beer and wine open bar and people did not complain, in fact they drank near $1400 in the beverages so it all worked out.
Post # 15
I have been to a truly open full bar wedding, MAYBE once, and I can’t even think of when. EVERYONE here does beer and wine and it’s totally normal
ETA: OH! My step brother’s 100k shindig down in Scottsdale Arizona! They’re divorced now. Oh and everyone was totally shitfaced
Post # 16
It is totally fine! We did it (well we had to becuase of the liquor license at the winery we married at), and it was completely fine! No complaints from anyone!