Sharing Your Husbands Last Name With the Ex

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
4797 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

carrolltobee:  Yup, I did in my previous marriage and I do now. Meh. No biggie. Plus I kept my ex’s last name after we divorced. It’s just a pain in the butt to change everything yet here I am doing it for my new hubby. Zoinks!

Post # 3
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Contemporary Art Center of Peoria

carrolltobee:  Hasn’t happened to me, but I’d be lying if I said it wouldn’t bother me a teeny bit. But, I also understand it’s time consuming to change it back. 

My FI’s brother married a girl with the same first name as me. So in the same town there will be two girls with the same name, different spelling, thank god. But it totally irks me, mostly because his brother is a jerk & they are somewhat estranged. 

Post # 4
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My ex’s wife never took his name but she still uses it on her website and some other things and that bugs us both – me just because lol but him because she never wanted it in the first place so don’t trade on it now!

Post # 5
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

carrolltobee: i don’t see why it matters. Changing it and changing it back or whatever is a pain. I’m not changing my name because it’s too much of a pain and I have a professional reputation built on this one. 

a phone book check shows multiple smiths, jones, carrolls, vus, phams, chans, martinezes, and so forth so I think sharing a last name is not a big deal. chances are we already do with many strangers. 

Post # 6
Member
4147 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I can’t comment on myself, but my mom kept her married name even though her and my dad have been divorced for 15 years.  She doesn’t like her maiden name and wanted to keep the same last name as her kids.  My dad’s gf hates that my mom and my sister and I even exist, so I’m sure it boils her blood that my mom never changed her name…so I kind of like that mom did keep it because the gf is a complete witch – but that’s a story for another time 😉

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by  Ryansgirl.
Post # 7
Member
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Yup and I can do you one better because we have the same first name too haha. Luckily she is now going back to her maiden name 

Post # 8
Member
3530 posts
Sugar bee

Thankfully I know for a fact that no other woman is walking around with my husband’s last name because she was married to him, because I’m his first and only wife.  But I’m not too sure if it would bother me.  I feel like it almost would, but it can be a hassle to change it back to the maiden name hence the reason they kept it as their ex-husband’s name.

Post # 9
Member
535 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I will, and it does bother me. I’m sure she’ll never remarry and she probably wouldn’t change it even if she did.

A few months after my divorce, word got out that my ex might have gotten married over the weekend. I hadn’t decided whether I wanted to change it back up until that point, but when I heard that, my name was changed back to my maiden name before noon. The thought of sharing a last name with my ex’s new “woman” made me sick. And I really didn’t want to be associated with him anymore. I felt totally freed afterwards 🙂

Post # 10
Member
567 posts
Busy bee

carrolltobee:  my mother is keeping my father’s name. they were married for 25 years so she says it’s because she is better known by that name than her maiden.  I would prob go back if I ever ended a marriage IMO.

Post # 11
Member
262 posts
Helper bee

i’m more borthered about sharing a name with his mom.  ugh.  

Post # 12
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - The Old Courthouse in Cleveland

Weird. The thought had never occured to me. I think I might be a tad bothered by it. Not angry, by any means… I think it would probably be different if the woman had kids that shared the father’s last name. My gma kept her last name to have the same last name as her kids, then it is surely understandable that she would want to keep his name. 

Post # 13
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - The Old Courthouse in Cleveland

andixlyn:  HAHAHAA ME TOO!!!!!!

Post # 14
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Oh yeah, that kind of chafed my buns for a while. But now she’s re-married and has changed her name again, so I don’t mind. But we still get her mail and THAT makes me crazy. She hasn’t lived in the house for over 3 years! CHANGE YOUR STUPID ADDRESS.

Post # 15
Member
42460 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It goes with the territory if you marry someone who has been married before. I kept my ex’s surname after my divorce because I had other priorities for my money than paying for a name change.

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