She didn't know she was pregnant!?!

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Considering she was completely not ready for this (I know, crazy), I think the statement that “Her maternal instincts are taking a while to kick in” is a little silly. Just because she just had a baby doesn’t mean she’ll ever have maternal instincts, especially since she has zero attachment to it. 

Post # 4
Member
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m not sure a completely unprepared 21 year old who wants nothing to do with a child she just squeezed out of her is the best person to be taking care of that baby…

Post # 5
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Another Bee posted a story last week about an aquaintence finding out she was pregnant and delivering a healthy baby boy the same day. It happens.

I wouldn’t judge her for wanting to put the baby up for adoption – she is only 21, and in an (unpaid?) internship – she might not be ready to be a mom.

Post # 6
Member
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

There was a whole series on TLC or Discovery for awhile called “I didn’t know I was pregnant”, so she’s not alone. Though after talking to some friends of mine who are physicians a lot of them think the younger girls are just in very strong denial.

A good friend of mine has seen a lot of young woman swear up and down that they’ve never had sex, EVER….yet here she is telling them they’re pregnant! They’ll say she’s wrong or even ask how they could have gotten pregnant since they never had sex. I don’t understand it! Crazy.

A sad situation for this young mother to be in though…I hope she is given time to make a sound decision and doesn’t act too quickly. Whatever her decision is it is best that it’s something she can live with and not regret. Putting the baby up for adoption isn’t the worst option.

Post # 7
Member
1286 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Wow, poor girl! So young and unprepared. I’m sure the other interns are doing their best to help her and the baby, but I don’t think that is the best set up for anyone (mom, baby or other interns). I’m actually very surprised the Internship is allowing this, you didn’t indicate if she went back to the internship, but since she hasn’t left yet and the other interns are helping, I assume there is something keeping her there (babies can fly as soon as a few days old).

Adoption may or may not be the best thing for her. She may go home to her normal support system and get the love and guidance she needs. Or she may make the very tough and intensely personal decision to put the child up for adoption. Either way, I hope she is trying to reach the father to inform him, he may have an opinion too.

Best of luck to her! Try to be gentle with her, I’m sure none of us would want to be in her shoes right now.

Post # 8
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  Major case of denial because she wanted to continue living life as normal instead of dealing with the pregnancy.  I think a very miniscule percent of women who say they didn’t know truly didn’t know but it’s not as many as the media and tv shows would have us think.

Post # 9
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@Miss_Magoo82:  that was me! I’ve seen pictures of my friend/acquaintance, her FI and beautiful baby boy–they seem to be a very happy new family!

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  it can definitely happen! I know a girl who this happened to just last week. I saw a picture of her right before she delivered, she looked like she might have been a few months along, but certainly not full term! They had gone to the doctor to see if she was pregnant, and went into labor that same day. Fortunately in this case, she’s 25, engaged, and they are now a very happy family.

Post # 10
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@gcwest:  +1. Adoption may be a good idea. There are a lot of couples who do want babies and are unable to conceive.

Post # 11
Member
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

i had a friend in high school who had no idea she was pregnant until she was about 5 or 5.5 months along. she was shocked, to say the least. but she had irregular periods which probably had something to do with it.

another friend who’s been pregnant twice, had no idea she was pregnant until she was like 28 weeks or something. and she’s been pregnant before! twice! 

it’s a weird thing when it happens! 😉

Post # 12
Member
4513 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

A friend of mine didn’t find out she was pregnant until she was 7months along. I saw her everyday in college and I’m telling you – you couldn’t tell. Her periods were always super irregular and she had gone through times before where she just didn’t get it for months so it didn’t seem unusual. She wasn’t sick, no weird cravings or anything out of the ordinary. She said a few times she did feel something but just assumed it was gas. When she found out she was pregnant we were all shocked – but her and her FI were super happy so I don’t think it was a matter of denial in her case.

I can’t even imagine not knowing until the day you go into labor! Or being one of these woman that “poops” out her baby in the toilet because she didn’t know she was pregnant!

Post # 13
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

@tiff-tiff-tiff:  I worked in infant care up until recently, and we had a 35 year old, internationally successful event planner Mom come in FRANTIC. Her son had just celebrated his first birthday, and she had found out THAT DAY that she was 6 months pregnant… with TWINS!

Post # 14
Member
2578 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My Mum was 22 and just over 5 months pregnant when she found out she was pregnant–with me. I was born a couple of weeks later, 3 months pre-mature.

Post # 15
Member
2675 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

This is why when I had irregular periods if I missed mine for more than a month and I was sexually active I would take a pregnancy test. I needed to be sure that it was just my body being irregular. It always was just irregular but I liked having that piece of mind.

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