She has no boundaries whatsoever

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
898 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Papillion:  I think he needs to tell her to knock it off. It’s obviously not appropriate and she knows he’s moved on, so he needs to make it clear to her that the behaviour is not acceptable.

Post # 4
573 posts
Busy bee

I think your SO does need to tell her off and to tell her to desist kissing him and hugging him like that, along the lines of “I’m not comfortable with this because Papillion means the world to me.”

Post # 5
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Sorry but how about instead of telling you he tell her to knock it off? That’s very odd to me. 

Post # 6
2193 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think you SO needs to be clear about whats appropriate and what isn’t. sounds like he is letting himself get into thosw situations by not being clear about how he feels.

“Thanks for dropping off “_______” we have plans i will see you when i drop him off goodbye.”

Dont stand around and chat, or if they need to make sure its only about the child. He needs to put his foot down.

Post # 8
1252 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@MrsWBS:  this is my thought.

Post # 9
1590 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Um, maybe she’s just a friendly person? Are you sure your FI isn’t overthinking things? I hug and kiss a lot of people hello and goodbye. 

Also, if she is hitting on him, and he is rejecting her advances properly, I don’t know that he needs to tell you every detail. One time SO went out without me and some girl hit on him before he told her about me. He didn’t tell me b/c he thought I’d be jealous, and I would have been. It later came out when she started seeing someone else in the group. I don’t have a problem with her, she didn’t know he was taken at first and I wasn’t around. I say she has good taste.

Anyway, your FI needs to make it clear that he’s not interested in her. I don’t think he needs to tell you about it every time because he can’t legally change when he sees her, and it will only upset you. 

Post # 10
11379 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@Papillion:  i would have a conversation with your bf about this.  he really needs to be telling his ex that it’s inappropriate.

stay positive so that you don’t sound defensive, “dear, thank you for letting me know about your ex’s behaviour earlier today.  i do appreciate your honesty.  you obviously told me b/c you felt that it is inappropriate/uncomfortable when she does this.  perhaps you should be telling her this too and not just me.”

i do know that some guys will try to deflect this point by saying that they don’t want to hurt her feelings.  if so, your response should be, “dear, i am hoping that at this stage in our relationship my feelings are more important to you than hers are.”

Post # 11
7147 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

It’s weird that he tells you this, ESP when you are at work. Are you sure she’s scoring on to him? 


Post # 12
1076 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Maybe he likes the attention? If you tell him it bothers you, he might keep it a secret then. It sounds like he might enjoy the affection from both you.

Post # 13
2884 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@Papillion:  kiss on the cheeks or lips?

a hug and kiss on the cheek is totally normal – 100%. i mean, they made a baby together and thats just being friendly. i kiss people on the cheek too, it doesnt mean i want to jump their bones

and i think having a friendly conversation is about maintaining a civilised relationship with an ex? i disgaree with pp it should be “hello.thanks for bringing kid. shooo shoo” like they hae to leave instantly. i think that would be a bad relationship

or do you mean a kiss on the lips/lunge? its not clear from the post




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