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If it were me, I wouldn't mind her taking the engagement party. It is the wedding that matters...that one is yours and without your wedding, her engagement party is just a party. She can't take credit for your engagement...you're the one with the shiny new ring. ;)
The whole reason I'm so POed is because AS SOON AS WE GOT ENGAGED (as in the same day) she informed me that she and my father would not be throwing an engagement party... they did not feel it was necessary.
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So if you've been following my posts, you know all about my family drama with my mother and the financialstuff we've been going through.
FI and I talked about 2 months ago and decided to re-start the planning process off on a positive note and have an Engagement Party so that our families could meet and we could celebrate the fact that we're getting married. I got addresses, I sent invitations, and... CRICKETS CHIRPING...
Everyone RSVPed to my mother and she started planning everything!!! She began to delegate who was bringing what food (because it apparently became a "pot luck" picnic), she picked out decorations and put people up at her house. To most, this is super helpful... but my mom is now taking credit for everything!! ERGH!!