(Closed) Shoes for bridesmaids…

posted 10 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
55 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

obnoxious as it may be, I think different shoes stick out terribly with tea length dresses.  the shoes are such a huge part of the overall look. 

Post # 4
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2008

Well.. I was in a friends wedding this past summer and didn’t mind paying for the matching shoes since she was pretty reasonable with the dresses (they were $100) so it was okay. I suppose it all comes down to expense.

I know that I personally would not use gold matte shoes again. (I’ve never had a gold pair of shoes in all my life) but if they’re something really cute that they could wear with maybe a cute black dress, white, something else, then maybe I would be okay with it if *I* were in your wedding (Pick me! Pick me!) but if you wanted me to pay another $75 for shoes I’m never going to wear again after spending $200 for a dress…. I wouldn’t be a happy camper.

Let us know what you decide.  🙂

Post # 5
Member
1061 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

my dresses are chocolate brown tea-length too, and i’m letting them choose their own shoes as long as they’re metallic. then again, i’m also letting them choose their own dresses (i just chose the color and fabric), so they’re not going to be matchy-matchy at all. it really depends on your bridal party though — mine happen to be 6 completely different girls (in many different ways) so pleasing everyone is close to impossible, and it wouldn’t make me happy if they weren’t comfortable.

Post # 6
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I’m one that is very particular about matchy-matchy for something like this so I would say get the same one especially since it is a tea-length dress.

Post # 7
Member
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I’m with Emily on this.

Post # 8
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee

I like matching shoes especially since it is a tea length dress.  Everyone’s taste and sense of style is different so what one bridesmaid might love as a shoe (and fit your cdefined riteria) might not be a shoe that you like at all – which in the end might stick out like a sore thumb when you get the pictures back. 

I vote for matching.

Post # 9
Member
47 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2008

I would also vote for matching shoes. I’ve seen some pictures where the shoes didn’t match and unfortunately it was noticeable. But honestly who will notice their shoes when all eyes are on you!

Post # 10
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2008

I guess I’m kind of the odd one out, well sort of.  While I don’t think I’m going to have them all wear the same exact shoe, I’m looking online to find a couple different styles that wouldn’t look totally different from one another, but do have subtle differences.  A couple Gold options, but one is a strappy sandal while the other is just a slide, because I know I have BMs who prefer both.  That way its not a free-for-all with some having some outrageously glittery shoes, but they can wear shoes that are comfortable and cute.

Post # 11
Member
31 posts
Newbee

I’m of the mindset that you should not pick out an adult’s shoes…no matter what.

I had 10 bridesmaids (yes, 10…) for my Saturday night NYC Black Tie optional wedding, with tea length dresses and I let them pick their own shoes.  Some were satin (shiny), some matte, one even patent leather.  You know what – they all looked great (even the one who wore shoes that were so NOT my taste), and more importantly, felt comfortable.  I think my pics refelect that they were happy, not that they didn’t match exactly.  I like a little of your ‘maids personal style to shine through…you love them for who they are, after all!

Post # 12
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

my bridesmaids wore espresso knee-length dresses (they were tea-length and we had them shortened), and i also gave them custom pearls.  i told them they could pick their own shoes, as long as they were espresso and strappy.  they passed ideas back and forth and even though they all chose different shoes, the overall look was still great.  no one looks at your shoes, and because they stuck to a similar theme, it didn’t look weird at all.

it bothered me enough forcing them to pay $160 for the same dress, plus having been a bridesmaid i know how uncomfortable the shoes could be.  it ended up much better b/c they all had shoes they loved and could be cost-effective for each of them.  i had made them flip-flops and b/c they all chose comfy shoes, they didn’t even need to wear them.

Post # 14
Member
230 posts
Helper bee

My girls are all wearing dresses in the same color and material but different styles – I worked really hard to find them dresses that they each felt comfortable in (not everyone wears halters!) that were <$100 and easy to get (Nordstrom). At first I was going to let them get their own shoes but then I decided, because the dresses are short, and different, I would like the same shoes to keep things congruent. I normally would agree with cab07 (I generally don’t think you should pick out another adult’s clothing or shoes!) but when I told my bm’s that I had picked shoes, they let out huge sighs of relief. There were grateful that I had done it, saving them the worry of picking something appropriate
on their own. It helped that I looked long and hard to find shoes that are really comfortable, pretty, rewearable, and less than $25!!

Post # 15
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

As someone who loves shoes, but who also has a hard time finding comfortable shoes, I say let them pick their own shoes.  So what if they don’t match?  No one will care.  If you’re worried about the pictures, ask the photographer to not show the shoes that much. 

Ugly shoes that do not match will not spoil your wedding for you or anyone else.  But if one or more of your bridesmaids is in agony the entire evening because her shoes are killing her, you may have lovely pictures, but she, your friend, will have a miserable time. 

Post # 16
Member
121 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - Pier Sixty, Chelsea Piers

I agree with cab07. I have 6 girls and just picked the color and length of their dresses. I’d like them to pick their own jewlery and shoes because I feel that they should have a chance to let their personal preferences shine too. If someone decides to wear patent leather flats, who am I to stop them! As long as they’re comfortable and having fun. I don’t need the added pressure of picking another thing and trying to get them all to agree and buy them at the same time.

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