Should BM and GM gifts cost the same amount?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should BM and GM gifts cost roughly the same amount?
    Yes, they should. : (13 votes)
    32 %
    No, it doesn't matter. : (28 votes)
    68 %
  • Post # 3
    42166 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @laureneliz87:  I think his idea is overboard as far as the cost. I would not feel comfortable accepting a $550 gift if I were in a wedding party.


    Post # 5
    1157 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @laureneliz87:  WOW that might be the most expensive bridal party gift I’ve ever heard of!  While I don’t think that all the gifts should be the exact same amount, I think that all the groomsmen’s gifts should be roughly the same and the bridesmaids’ should be roughly the same (Best Man and MOH can be a bit more).  However, I would personally be way more inclined to get the bridesmaids more expensive gifts (in my personal situation) as they are WAY more involved and helpful than any of his groomsmen haha.

    Post # 6
    1107 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I don’t think it matters at all the cost of the gifts being the same amount, but wow, a $500+ gift.  I would feel a bit uncomfortable accepting that haha.

    Post # 7
    22125 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I think you should buy whatever you’d like to for your bridesmaids as gifts, and whatever you can afford, regardless of how much he’s spending on the groomsmen. I think $550 is a lot, but I don’t feel like I’m in a place to say what he should spend. But I agree that I’d be surprised and feel almost guilty if someone spent that much on me!

    I don’t think the girls will be comparing their gifts to the guys’ watches. They will just care about the thought that you put into their gift(s). And for the record, I think $150 is totally generous! 🙂

    Post # 9
    715 posts
    Busy bee

    @laureneliz87:  Those are some pricey watches! Wow! I think they are too expensive to give and put a lot of pressure on the GM… (gm: Well Laureneliz’ DH got me a 550$ watch… i guess i can’t do a $30 flask then, when i am the groom and he’s my  best man…)  

    ETA: I do like your idea of taking care of the BM’s other expenses. Like you said, I’d also be like wtf? if I got a $500 gift; 

    just some thing to keep in mind: are the GM and BM close? is a conversation like this likely? (gm: “hey, did you book your room yet for the wedding?” BM: “book? why should i book the room Laureneliz87 is taking care of that…” GM: “okay… that’s odd?! why do we have to foot the bill and you get free accomodation? “)

    if you want to avoid that kind of possible drama, you could opt for some spa treatment thing instead maybe?! (but yes, not everyone does enjoy a ~$90 massage + ~$40 face treatment+~$50 mani-pedi… ) 

    Post # 10
    1157 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @laureneliz87:  Oooh I think that’s a GREAT idea!  You should still use your own $150 to get them actual gifts, but sure!  If he’s that gung ho about something wedding-related and he can afford it then more power to him.  Your bridesmaids will love you for it!

    Post # 11
    1302 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Our gifts did cost the same – we also had married couples in our bridal party (Husband was a GM and wife was a BM) so we knew they would know what everyone else got.

    Side note – I just think $550 is too much to spend on each GM! Unless you only have like 1 or 2 maybe?

    Post # 12
    3570 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    That’s insane.  We spent $150 per person and I thought that was a huge amount (Jcrew watches for the guys, purses for the girls).

    I think it would be kind of a shame to buy people $500 watches that they may not even like.  I know my DH wouldn’t wear a watch that costs that much.


    Post # 13
    11772 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    My girls’ gifts were $20-25, DH’s GM gifts were $80 ($120 for the BM).

    So I was going to say let him pick the gifts, but $550 is an INSANE amount! Unless he can get a discount for ordering multiples?

    Post # 15
    1216 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @laureneliz87:  I think $550 is WAYYY too much. I think your price range is much more reasonable. Honestly all of the weddings I’ve participated in have had small gifts that were probably under $25 each. Just a nice little thank you, without breaking the bank.

    Post # 16
    2800 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @laureneliz87:  I like your idea of fronting thier cost with the $500.  We are fronting our wedding party hotel accomidation. 

    A $550 is a bit steep for a wedding party gift.  I think instead of looking at being even with the gifts (not necessary in my opinion, but nice) I think you need to look at your GMs and ask your FI if they would be comfortable accpting a gift that expensive.

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