Post # 1
I need a reality check here. My FI is a very classy guy, and has owned his own tux since he was like 20. He needed one for college choir performances, and we go to the opera and symphony and whatnot, so he had lots of occasions to wear one, so buying his own just made sense. And it’s a great tux – an Oscar de la Renta (don’t worry, he got a great deal on it, definately not retail price)!
So for the wedding, he clearly wants to wear a tux, and he definately doesn’t want to rent one. Which leaves us with either wearing the tux he’s had for 7+ years or to buy a whole new tux. The pragmatist in me says there’s no good reason to buy another tux when he has a perfectly good one, but on the other hand, something about him wearing the same thing he’s worn to a thousand frat formals and random choir concerts and just makes me kind of sad. I mean, I have other perfectly lovely formal dresses, but I still bought a new dress that will be just for the wedding, right? I guess I just think of how special it’s going to feel for me putting on all new clothes, knowing that he’s never seen me wear them, and how they’ll always be the clothes I got married in. And I don’t see how he’s going to get that same feeling putting on the tux he’s worn 50 times before, and that I’ve seen him wear 50 times before, and it’ll be the same thing he’s wearing in pictures of us from dozens of performances and college formals.
One thing we’re considering is that his current tux has notched lapels, and if he bought one with peaked lapels, then at least he wouldn’t have two identical tuxes… Or maybe having a tux custom made, because then the fit would be phenomenal, but I have no idea how much that costs.
What do you ladies think? Has anybody else had this problem? I should note FI is in a quandry about this too.
Post # 3
Reading this I was on both sides! It’d be nice to save the money you’d spend on a brand new tux and put that toward something else. But, it would be super nice for you both to have a new garment to make new memories in. I have to say, i am leaning towards the idea that he should buy a new tux. Not only to make this special, but also because it really sounds like he wears them quite a lot more then most men, so he’d get a lot of milage out of a new one. You could get him a new tux, then take it to a tailor to get some “made to fit him like a glove” details sewn in!
I was actually searching for some suits/tuxes on amazon the other day and came across these sellers with great deals. Maybe one of these is his “the one”?
Post # 4
My FI also has a tux that he has worn throughout college and for the three years after. He’s getting a new one for the wedding, mainly because he was about 40 pounds lighter and a few inches shorter when he entered college and it doesn’t really fit well anymore!
Post # 5
how about purchasing a new vest and band and etc. to match your colors instead of having to buy a whole new tux?
i’m debating the same thing, as fi has a tux that’s in mint condition!
Post # 6
Thanks bees! Update – I just found a place in Chicago that makes custom tuxes for ~$600, which is less than I was expecting. We’re going to meet with them and see how they look. Still no decision, but at least I feel like this is one option…
@rabbit – Thanks! I was worried I’d get a lot of comments telling me I was being sucked in by the bridal industry for wanting something new just for the wedding. But he’ll definately get a lot of use out of it after the wedding, so I don’t think I’m that crazy… And I hadn’t even thought about customizing an off the rack tux!
@hilsy85 – Yeah, FI hasn’t changed enough for that to be an issue, otherwise I’d jump all over that to justify buying a new one 🙂
@missjyc – Glad to see I’m not the only one with this problem! The thing is FI is very old school when it comes to suits/tuxes (the guy wears a tie tack and a collar bar, and has more pocket squares than I have purses), so he wants the traditional black vest & tie look. Otherwise, that would be a great compromise.
Post # 7
Hi ChiCat, I wholeheartedly endorse purchasing a new tux. If he’s oldschool when it comes to tuxes, that means he probably wants to get something that is traditional black tie. As you mention, his current tux has notched lapels which is a bit less formal like a business suit. He would need peak or shawl lapels if he wants a more classic dinner jacket for the wedding and for future black tie events. Personally, I think the $600 custom tux sounds great. I bought my dinner jacket and pants and now have to do all sorts of alterations and the total will be over $600. It’ll look fantastic, but it won’t look nearly as sharp as your fiance’s custom tuxedo that won’t require alterations!
You guys go to black tie events, and there’s no better time to upgrade his black-tie attire than for his wedding. To me, this is a no-brainer, especially since your future hubby enjoys dressing himself with classic style.