Post # 1
I’m excited, because I finally stopped creeping around and made an account! In anycase to make a long story short, I’m 21 (22 in December) and I’ll be graduating with my degree in December. My boyfriend and I have been dating for what will be 4 years in January. Our families have known each other for quite a while but of course have become extremely close the past years. (Oh I should mention that my Boyfriend will be 23 next month, and has already graduated and has a great full time job 🙂 )
Approximately, 2 years ago my BF went to talk to my parents and let them know that he knew I was the one for him, and if he could have their blessings for when I had completed school. I know it was a bit early, but he likes to plan things out and wanted to make sure that he could have enough time to find the ring and to be able to pay it off. My parents were caught a little off guard (I’m the oldest child) but didn’t say much else. The only thing they mentioned was that he should wait till after I’m done school, because otherwise i’d be too distracted, which was fine. My parents that night told me what he said, but just left it at that, they were a little worried because he’s my “first real life longer than a couple months boyfriend”. In anycase, I just let it go and we went shopping for the ring together, bought it and fast forward to now.
We both came to the realization in the last couple weeks that I would be done school in December, and it’s nearly time for the engagement! Now here comes my problem, do you think that he should let my parents know that he’s planning to propose? Do you think they should just assume that it’s coming? I dont know why I’m getting so paranoid. I guess I’m just worried cause they never really said anything the first time he asked. Any advice bees? I dont even know what I’m typing anymore! Hopefully it all makes sense.
Post # 3
Maybe have him talk to them again just as a heads, my parents were expecting us to get engaged but he wanted to ask just to keep the piece and make everyone happy.
Post # 4
Since he already asked them once, I think you are in clear. They probably are expecting it, not that you’re done with school.
Post # 5
Thanks for the advice, I think I’m just going to see how it plays out. I know that even though he asked, I feel like he needs to just let them know, but he did ask them so they should expect it. Ah! Hopefully it all works out!
Post # 6
In this case I would say yes. Maybe he should plan a solo visit or call just because typically the parents are informed/asked for their blessing closer to it actually happening. And early congrats btw!
Post # 7
If I were you I’d take some of the pressure off and make some comment so that your parents know a proposal is likely coming. I’d feel awful for the poor guy if he gets a so-so reaction from them not once, but twice!
Post # 8
Hmm I don’t know.
Since he did ask such a long time ago, then it probably wouldn’t hurt to give them the heads up.
Post # 9
My husband never said anything to my parents. I had told them that I was suspecting that he was working on a proposal, but they never got confirmation until we were engaged. If you are happy with him and you want to marry him, don’t worry about whether or not your parents are prepared for it.
Post # 10
@Wonderstruck: That’s exactly what I’m worried about and I believe that’s what he’s worried about as well. I think he just doesn’t want them to say something the second time around, just incase me finishing school first was just an excuse for them.
Post # 11
No need for him to ask again. He stuck his neck out once, and they had reservations. Do you think he’d really NOT ask you if they did not offer a blessing? How would that make you feel in the end, knowing that?
You don’t need parents’ permission for anything any longer. It’s ultimately your decision.
Post # 12
I agree this is completely your choice. He already ask, it wouldnt be fair to hime to set that kind of pressure on him all over again. 🙂
Post # 13
I think you should leave it up to him on whether he wants to ask again or not.
Post # 14
Thanks everyone! I think I’m just going to leave it up to him to decide. 🙂