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When SO and I first started dating we went to karaoke a lot. He knew a lot of people at the place we went to, including an older woman (50-60ish) and her husband. They're very friendly people so when she friend-requested me on Facebook, I accepted.
Well, turns out she's not so nice -- or rather, it's more like we have very differing opinions on certain subjects. She would make rude statuses towards certain groups of people, etc. I unsubscribed from her updates so I didn't have to see her bigotry on my feed. And SO and I haven't been to karaoke in a while now, so I actually haven't even talked to or seen her for a couple months.
Anyway, I logged onto facebook yesterday and she had gone through my photos and tagged herself in all the pics of me and my SO -- all the romantic pics, I should say. Pics of us hugging or kissing or just generally looking lovey-dovey. It *really* creeped me out. She's not even in the pictures to begin with, and they're rather emotionally intimate photos. I felt sort of violated, actually.
I went through and untagged her from all of them. I'm wondering if I should say something to her about it, though. I mean, that's a weird thing to do, am I right? What would you all do?
I would unfriend and block her. If you ever bump into her again and she asks, I would just say you were having security issues and either got off Facebook altogether, or you deleted everyone except family ;) If you block her she'll never know that you're still on there unless she asks someone else you know.
On a side note, my best friend's MIL tags herself in photos of her and DH because she likes the photos. She thinks she's saving them for later like a bookmark. Maybe she flips through them in the "photos of you" section or something?! My best friend asked her to stop, but she still does it, LOL!
I would just ask her why she did it. Depending on her answer, take action
I know some older people who do this because they want to be able to see them later-- so they can go through their "photos of me" as a sort of album of all their favorite photos of their friends?
That said, it's real creepy if she's doing it to your romantic photos and I'd untag them all, too.
@bakerella: That's a good point -- sort of bookmarking the photo. Still, it freaks me out to think of this woman randomly flipping through photos of me and my guy. I can see why a MIL would do it, though!
I could see what Bakerella mentioned being a plausible explination. I know a lot of the "older" crowd doesn't really understand the ins and outs of Facebook (to this day, my mom still types in google's address and searches "log into my facebook" to access her FB account) - I'd chalk it up to a misunderstanding of the technology vs. something icky.
Still, that is weird and if you dislike her updates enough to hide her then it'd probably be best to remove her completely.
Creeper!! Delete and block. That's just too weird.
@jocember: My dad thinks that my personal Facebook page is the Facebook homepage. He was logged out one time and he called me to have me teach him how to log-in, and then when he saw his newsfeed he didn't know what it was and kept asking me how to get to the homepage... turns out he just has mine bookmarked (only child over here) so he can see my pictures and keep up with my life.
Yep, second all the PPs - delete her and block. That's so weird and bizarre; I would feel SO SO SO uncomfortable with that.
Hahahaha - oh Facebook...
My mom is on it, and she "gets it", in part because my sister and I gave her some facebook etiquette lessons before we'd be her "friend" (haha)... but she has a friend who definitely does NOT get it... she posted a professional photograph of herself - with quite a bit of cleavage - and tagged a bunch of her friends in it, I guess so they would see it? But she tagged my mom as her right boob. Like RIGHT on where her nipple would be, is my mom. BOOB.
My mom was all "Help!! I want to untag it but I don't want to hurt her feelings!!" I couldnt stop laughing any time I looked at my Mom's page, and the very first picture of her in the heading was a boob.
Anyways - my point is, I wouldn't diagnose her as a total psycho - but that is TOTALLY wierd, and I think untagging and unfriending is fine, or if you don't want to unfriend her, just send her a message saying youd rather not have anyone tagging your photos.
What? Was she trying to be funny? That is super gross. I'd delete and probably never go back to karaoke again. Yeesh.
What? Was she trying to be funny? That is super gross. I'd delete and probably never go back to karaoke again. Yeesh.
I guess you have heard the majority: Delete and BLOCK.
This is not just weird, this is stalking!
And if you have any other problems, try asking FACEBOOK, maybe they can block her if she does this to others too!
oh my god delete and block. this hardcore gave me the creeps. i cant get into it much further than that...this is the oddest thing i've ever heard of!!!!!
That is super weird. If she isn't someone you want to maintain a friendship with then I vote for the delete and block option.
It definitely could be that she doesn't really know the ins and outs of using FB. I have a friend (who is my age) who finally got on Facebook and she does the weirdest things. Like, tagging me in a picture of her brother and his friends drinking. Uh...weird.
It's probably just a case of what a few other people mentioned - older people don't seem to "get" the point of tagging pictures in Facebook, and she probably just liked your photos and wanted to have them in her album. One of my husband's Aunt's did this to ALL of the wedding pictures we posted on Facebook, and I was totally creeped out at first, until I realized why she was doing it - I just untagged her and she didn't re-tag herself.
even before she tagged your photos-- I have zero tolerance for bigotry. I would have unfriended her a long time ago, not just blocked her.
so I agree with PPs. she has now crossed the line. undfriend her, untag the photos, and block her.
I wonder if there is a way you can untag all photos at the same time? it's worth looking into. it might automatically happen when you unfriend or block her, but I'm not positive.
Umm if you don't like her posts/don't really know her/don't subscribe to her posts then your not going to lose out by defriending her, as she's not really a friend anyway :)
WHOA! Delete and block. The bigotry wouldn't have been enough for me to delete and block her. Even if she doesn't know facebook very well... that's just weird.
My first thought UNFRIEND but honestly after reading evryones elses post about her being older I would let curiousity kill that cat and ask her. Maybe she is a swinger lol! I had a lady EVERY mom hated at my school but she was always really really nice to me...and then I found out her and her hubby were swingers and me and my SO at the time were thier "type" ew! lol! It made me laugh, didn't creep me out at all cause it was just funny to me! So now I want to know, is the lady from your dilema creepy or innocent or a swinger;P
I would probably just delete her since she doesn't really interest you on there anyways!
About her not knowing how to use Facebook, that could be true. FI's mom writes things in her status updates like "Hey Joey, how are you doing?" instead of going to Joey's homepage and writing it on his wall :P
But it doesn't really seem like this one is worth your time.
@HeyKaraoke: um yeah at first I thought she was in the pics in the background or something but that is way creepy. I would delete her,sounds like she might be obsessed with you guys
Hahahaha what a nut job! What would addressing it do? Unless you just want the entertainment of watching her try to explain it ;)
I wonder if on some level she doesn't get how facebook works. Maybe she meant she liked the pictures. My great-aunt tagged herelf in a picture of me taking a shot while playing Kings and wrote a message to me about how she missed me. It was totally weird, because it followed a bunch of comments about drinking games and partying. But I knew she was just looking at the latest pictures of what I was up to and trying to say hi.
Maybe she is really bizarre and inappropriate, but I don't want to rule out the possibility that she is of a different generation that has a very different understanding of Facebook etiquette. :)
Yeah, my guess is that it's more 'Net-fail than anything else, but I think you can easily defriend and make up a security issue. If she presses you on it, then you'll know that she's Crazytown.
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