Post # 1
I’ve been depressed lately and considering cancelling my wedding due to personal issues and instead going to get married at the court house (Im not into this wedding planning stuff and its stressing me and my FI out). My folx are helping us with the wedding bill . I am getting strapped paying for things and feel uncomfortable with my parents paying for stuff too.
My mother assumes that I feel like they “arent paying things down fast enough” and I told her that wasnt the case as to why Ive been feeling down lately…I just told her I just dont want a big wedding anymore and I am willing to pay them back everything they paid for already….She’s been telling me that I need to change my attitude (?)
Well, this evening I was trying on my wedding gown to cheer myself up (and just seeing if I wanted to change my mind lol)…and my mom took pics in her camera phone of me in the dress.
After she takes the pics, she sets the phone down, open to her texts (she was about to text me the pic), and walks away to get something. She tells me to send the pics of myself to my phone….and while I am doing this I find a text she wrote to my sisters saying how mean and ungrateful I was (?)…I just walked away.
Should I say something? Or just walk around angry?
Post # 3
Call her out on it. Otherwise it will eat at you.
Post # 4
I think you should be honest and tell her how you came across the message and you’re just wondering how she really feels. Since you still have a few months before the wedding (mine is the same day btw) it might be better to get things out in the open and work through them.
Post # 5
I’d definitely say something, if I were you. If she really feels that way, she needs to come clean too.
Post # 6
Yeah, but I think you need to address it as “Mom, what am I doing that is making you feel this way, how can I make this better?” instead of “Why did you go behind my back?”
Post # 7
you need to be honest with her. Just try and be respectful and honest with her. dont do the blame game. give her the benefit of the doubt but tell her how hurt you are. This is your mother, she loves you very much I am sure.
Post # 8
Definitely ask her about it. For the sake of being honest and for your own clarification! Totally agree with @Rubies though, tread lightly.
Post # 9
Thanks ladies. I may ask her about it, but I am so angry right now that Ill wait. I dont need to push her away. I dont need to feel even more alone than I already do. when i do ask ill tread lightly.
sidenote : (Now I know why my dad hasnt spoken to me lately lol..its her)