(Closed) Should I change my wedding date FH mother is ill

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Should I change my wedding day because FH's mom is ill?
    Yes : (23 votes)
    62 %
    No : (10 votes)
    27 %
    Get married and wait for reception : (4 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    53 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think the most sensible thing to do is to change the date. You don’t want to start things off on the wrong foot, and I’m sure having his mother there is very important. Think about if it were your mother… Wouldn’t you want the date changed? 

    Post # 4
    Member
    11753 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    hard to say without knowing details. I’d wait until after surgery to see what state she is in and decide then.

    Post # 5
    Member
    853 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I agree with MrsWBS. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    36 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    How far off is the wedding? The nice thing to do is to wait, but if you have made deposits on venues and such, that can make it a little more difficult.

     

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    Post # 7
    Member
    7653 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    (assuming FI’s mom isn’t going to be recovered by then) If FI wants her there, then change it. It doesn’t seem like you will have too much trouble changing it if you have an alternate date picked out.

    And its ok that it is over Memorial Day weekend. Having my mother there would be worth more than any other guests that couldn’t show up because it was an extended holiday weekend.

    Post # 9
    Member
    92 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I am not sure what kind of surgery she is having, but as a nurse I think that a month an a half is A LOT of time to recover, unless there are other underlying issues. If you have all of your deposits down (and you have to remember all of the people that you’ve invited that are driving/flying in) it won’t be easy to change that. I would highly suggest waiting until after surgery to see how she is doing. Like I mentioned before, I would have a better idea if i know her medical background or what surgery she is having but a month an a half is a lot of time to recover. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    4352 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I think its too late to change the date since you’ve probably put down a lot of nonrefundable deposits and I suspect guests have already made travel arrangements.

    Post # 12
    Member
    4046 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    If she is going into surgery tomorrow, perhaps wait until she is out and ask doctors what her recovery schedule is like. Will one more day make a big difference?

    Post # 13
    Member
    503 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    even with open heart surgery six weeks should be plenty of time for recovery, unless she has a complication. i would talk to the cardio thoracic surgeon, and explain the situation and ask about her recovery time. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    92 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    +1 @Jamieg

    I would recommend talking to the surgeon as well. I agree that 6 weeks is plenty of time to recover unless there are complications. I don’t think this sounds like it is about you, you just want her to be there and want to make sure it happens! Don’t change anything just yet, find out more from the MD <3

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