Post # 1
Long story short..my mom is an alcoholic and has treated me horribly over the years, my sister hardly ever talks to me..she decided to break off from the family like 17 years ago. Idk why she broke it off from me, I could understand from my mom though..so, like my fam is totally disfunctional. My father passed when I was young, and I am not really close with my step-dad. I would only invite people cause I feel obligated but it would make me uncomfortable if they were there. However, maybe they would feel bad if I didn’t invite them..though, I am not sure why because they just really are not in my life and I have made my own “family”. Sucks cause my man’s family is like super tight, like way too tight if you ask me. Like Everybody Loves Raymond type of tight. Ugh. I may feel guilty not inviting certain people, only cause they may be disappointed but I may say to heck with it all and elope? Your thoughts? Thanks bees.
Post # 3
Tobe perfectly honest, if you have serious thoughts about eloping and your FI is okay with it, Do It! My family wasn’t okay with us eloping, or even having a small, immediate family only wedding, so we went bigger. Had then been okay with it, we totally would have eloped!
If eloping is just a pipe dream and you are actually going to have a wedding, then I’d do what you feel most comfortable with, being mindful of how you might feel looking back. If you would feel uncomfortable with your family there, I wouldn’t invite them. They aren’t in your life, so I don’t think there is an obligation to invite them.
Post # 4
@kalliela: i’ve struggled a bit wit this too… but only cause my family is sooo big and disbursed thruout the country that i feel like they wont come anyways and cuz i dont have close relationships wit most….even the ones i’m inviting i dont talk to on a regular basis….
my advice to you….sit back and think about 20 yrs from now, or even 50 yrs from now….when your thinking of your overall wedding, are you going to be disappointed that your family was there or not?? this is the question i had to ask myself, and in my vision of my perfect wedding day, my family was all there, including the ones i hadn’t seen since forever….so thats why i’m inviting them, and now its up to them to choose whether they want to be a part of our day or not….just think about how you would feel first because its yours and your FH’s special day…. thats my opinion…
Post # 5
Thanks! Ya, I feel obligated, but why?? It’s my day right? I would like a real wedding but there’s noone really on my side of the fam I want to invite-ya, my fam is that disfunctional. So sad..every girl wants a beautiful wedding with your family and friends..it’s just a sad time really. I want a nice wedding..but it just would remind me that I don’t really have a family:(. It’s just so sad:(.
Oh yeah, to be honest..I don’t think I would regret not inviting them..they just have not treated me very good at all, for no reason, honestly. I really don’t see them in my life because they just haven’t been around. There is a lot of hurt and having them there would feel fake to me..and I probably would not see them again for a very long time.
Post # 6
@MamaHusky3: That’s really great advice, I totally agree.
@kalliela: I would invite the people who you feel are your family. Just because they’re not blood related it doesn’t make them any less important in your life. This is the perfect day to tell them how much you care about them.