(Closed) Should I invite my extended family to the wedding?

posted 5 years ago in Family
  • poll: To invite or not?
    Yes, because it would be the socially acceptable thing to do : (0 votes)
    Yes, because it would be a great time to hold a family reunion while celebrating your new marriage : (2 votes)
    12 %
    Yes, so you don't offend anyone or cause hurt feelings. : (2 votes)
    12 %
    No, being related doesn't mean they get an automatic invite. Especially if you aren't close. : (10 votes)
    59 %
    No, the budget is tight, don't go overboard just to appease someone else. : (3 votes)
    18 %
    Other (explain below please) : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    10 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’m not, only because I am not inviting people whose names I dont know only because my grandmother is trying to guilt trip me.

    Post # 4
    Member
    261 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’m in a similar situation, except I’ve had a falling out with family.  I think it depends on your budget.  If you can afford it I would invite them.  While you may not be close they’re family and not inviting could cause problems.  If you can’t afford it don’t and just simply explain that.  

    Post # 5
    Member
    38 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    My family is HUGE.  Out of 40something cousins, I only like 2 or 3 of them.  My mom is making me invite them all.  I definitely don’t want to, but she’s paying for it and I don’t want another fight.  If I were paying for it, I would definitely cut down the list. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    250 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I am not on bad terms with my extended family but, like you, have no meaningful relationship with aunts, uncles, or cousins.  I expressed this to my mom re: the guest list (FI and I are paying for the wedding).  My parents decided that it was $2k of their own money to keep the peace and have the extended family there.  Is this a palatable option for you?

    Post # 7
    Member
    6124 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Tarheelgurl:  So I don’t know if I want to shell out thousands of dollars to have them at my wedding, even if it’s the “right” thing to do.

    I don’t think inviting them is right and not inviting them is wrong.  What is right is what you feel OK spending money on!  It’s not an etiquette rule to invite everyone you’re related to, that’s really up to the couple and their budget.  So you’re not breaking any rules!

    Post # 8
    Member
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    I only invited one out of twelve cousins. Unfortunately, we’re all so spread out across the country, I’ve only seen that one in the past seven years. If a family reunion was that important  to everyone, they would have planned one themselves, instead of using my wedding as an excuse for one. I don’t think you have to tell these cousins, etc. anything, since you don’t speak to them.

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