should i invite my kids

posted 3 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

As the mother of grown up children myself, all I would say is that my sons would have been very hurt indeed if I’d got married and told them afterwards. My stepchildren would have felt similarly if my DH had too.

But then we don’t have the complication of any sort of disputes with ex-husbands and wives.

My advice would be to ask them to attend the wedding. It’s not a day to ponder on past hurts with previous partners.

 

Post # 4
Member
1259 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I say invite them. If you want it then give it a try. If they don’t come then that would suck but at least you will know you tried. Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
1137 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@shelleymasters2:  You should talk to them. Tell them it is important for you for them to be there. They are grown up, they are able to make their own decision. 

I hope everything turns out OK! 🙂

Post # 7
Member
1242 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand

I think it can’t hurt to put it out there. They may be more hurt if you don’t invite them; it gives your ex more fuel to the fire in hurting your relationship with your children. 

Post # 8
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@shelleymasters2:  You may not get the response you want but I would invite them. At least that way there are no hurt feelings and you are being up front about your intentions. Congrats on getting married, wish you the best!

Post # 9
Member
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

I would ask them. If they don’t feel comfortable coming, then fair enough. I think that you should have a conversation with them (don’t just send an invite).

Post # 10
Member
1249 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@shelleymasters2:  Coming from a family with remarried parents, I think you should extend the proverbial olive branch and let the children decide.

Post # 11
Member
657 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I would invite them, my dad never invited me to his second wedding and it hurt especially since we have a great relationship

Post # 14
Member
2111 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

One of my very best friends has divorced parents. Neither she nor her brother were invited to their moms second wedding. I don’t think she’s every really forgiven her mom for that among other mistakes. If their dad wasn’t the favorite before, he certainly is now, though.

Post # 15
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Even though they may taken sides with your ex-husband, they are still your children and should be given the courtesy of an invitation. Whether they accept or decline is besides the point. I’d be very hurt if either of my divorced parents remarried without inviting us, even if we favoured one of them.

 

Post # 16
Member
4163 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

I would invite them. If they say no, I realize that you could be hurt, but I agree with PP- not inviting them could cause more damage to the relationship.

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