If you love your ring, can you "distract" him with putting his generosity towards something else? Like "Babe, I love this ring so much and it means a lot to me that it is the ring you proposed with. But, if you really want to buy something, here's a wedding band I really love." Or, "I've been wanting to splurge on XYZ for the wedding, but it hasn't been in the budget. Would you buy that for me instead?"
What is it, since it isn't diamond? CZ? Moissanite? Sapphire?
If it's CZ, I'd consider letting him replace it since it will cloud up over time and you may not be in a position to replace it at that time. Your ring IS lovely!!! I like it.
You could swap the stone for a real diamond and re-set the current stone into another piece of jewelery? What kind of stone is it? If CZ, I'd replace it since CZ doesn't last forever.
If you love your ring, put the $ towards a honeymoon or trip you both can enjoy. Men feel like they need to make everything right, even if it already is in your mind. My FI constantly asks me if my ring is big enough, good enough, and if I still love it. Just tell him u do...period
@NAvery: Its a cz i think thats why he has his heart set on changing it and i make the mistake of saying that i didnt really like shaped wedding bands and that i most likley will need one with my current engagment ring.
@MrsSoonToBePeters: I think it's gorgeous!! If you want to replace the center stone, maybe look at Moissanite?
I would let him do it. A CZ won't stand the test of time and if a guy wants to do something for you, you might end up hurting is pride/feelings if you don't let him.
I think your e-ring would look better with a straight band than a corved one, personally - so no worries there! I'd maybe just upgrade the stone to something more durable. I'd go with moissy myself!
later on in life, there will always be something else to spend the money on
so if you want a diamond and he wants to buy it, I say let him
We got married super young, and my husband has always viewed my ring as a symbol of his hard work making a great life for us. (I dont get it, Id wear a twisty tie on my finger and call it a day!) And hes upgraded my ring at 1 year, 5 years and 10 years. It makes him happy, and so I go along with it. He knows I dont expect him to upgrade my ring, and that Id even be fine with not upgrading, but that somehow makes him even more set on the idea LOL.
If your FI is really set on it, and you can afford it, Id let him. I have my original promise ring and my original teensy diamond ring saved for our daughters one day. Sometimes I still wear them on my right hand.
If you guys can afford it now, then yes. The CZ won't stand up in the long run.
I think moissanite would be a good compromise. Much cheaper than a diamond, but it will hold up over time.
@MrsSoonToBePeters: If money isn't an issue, go for the diamond upgrade in a similar setting. CZ won't last and moissanite won't look exactly like a diamond. You don't need to rush it, though... find something you love.
I say go with it. A ring means a lot to your guy and let him get the one that he always wanted to get you. Keep your current ring and wear it as a right hand ring
yea, just let him do what he wants to do. Engagement ring is really important for a guy, too! my guy spent a lot of money on mine, but he's in LOOVE with it. he frequently stares at it whenever the light hits it just right, and loves to play around with it while holding my hand watching a movie, etc...
it sounds like it means a lot to him, you should let him do as he wishes! you can still have this ring and wear it as much as you want! maybe you can make it fit your right hand, and you can wear both if you'd like :)
Congratulations!!! and it's always sweet to hear about a guy who really wants the best for his girl.. <3
I would keep the setting and just change out the centre stone for whatever "forever" stone you prefer....diamond, moissanite, or Amora gem (soon hopefully!).
That's a good compromise between the sentimentality of keeping the ring he proposed with and having a durable stone.
I think a straight band would look fine with your ring, or you have the option of wearing each ring on a different hand.
i am a very sentimental person, so I can definitely understand not wanting to get rid of the oiginal ring he proposed with. However, as many others have mentioned, you'll probably want something that will last (and the CZ will not).
If it were me, I would keep the ring intact and set it aside to wear on special occasions (an anniversary, for example) as a right hand ring. This way you'll have the original ring in its original form. This will also give you the option of selecting an engagement ring that won't require you to get a shaped wedding band (since you mentioned you aren't crazy about those).
It's ultimately up to you, but it sounds like it would mean a lot to your fiance to be able to get you the type of ring he initially envisioned giving you.
If you want to keep the ering then maybe just let him get you a nice band that you would be able to wear alone. Let him know how much this ring means to you as it is but let him know that you still want a pretty band that you could wear alone :)
What a gorgeous ring! But, hey, if he wants to buy you diamonds why not? You could wear your current ring as a RHR or keep it as a keepsake. It's really lovely!
But it CRACKS ME UP when people say CZ won't stand the test of time. Um, YES IT WILL - it's very hard on the Mohs scale, harder than many gemstones - so if an emerald, sapphire, ruby or other gemstone will stand the test of time, so will a CZ. It's nuts to think it won't last for decades, if you know the Mohs scale. CZ is almost as hard as moissanite, although less expensive, usually. And even diamonds can break or chip, although they won’t get scratched.
I have to point this out, because I own many gemstone rings, gems listed below, and so many Bees have gemstone engagement rings as well.
On the Mohs scale of hardness:
Diamond – 10
Moissanite – 9
Ruby – 9
Sapphire – 9
Cubic Zirconia – 8.5
Emerald – 8
Morganite – 7.5
Aquamarine – 7.5
Tanzanite – 7.5
Garnet – 7.5
Amethyst – 7
Peridot – 6.5
Nobody ever tells the owners of gemstone engagement rings, “Oh, it will get cloudy and won’t last.” All of my gemstone rings, listed above, have lasted me for 10 years or more, with regular wear, and are still sparkly and beautiful. And plenty of them are set in sterling silver, also perfectly durable and will last just as long as gold, especially rhodium plated sterling silver. Sometimes silver, depending on the thickness of the ring, will last longer than gold because gold is a very soft metal.
For the record, my engagement ring and wedding ring are diamonds and platinum, so I feel certain they’ll last me a lifetime.
But I CRINGE whenever I see someone pointing out to a Bee who has a CZ engagement ring that hers "will not last” or “will get cloudy with time.” It is simply inaccurate to say that and unless we start pointing that out about all gemstone e-rings it’s unfair to the owners of CZ rings to point that (false information) out to them.
OP – if you love your CZ ring as is, rock it as long as you want. If you want to go with diamonds and your FI wants to purchase that for you, that’s fine, do whatever makes both of you the happiest.
I wish you all the best!!
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A little over a year ago I got engaged. It was a beautiful simple proposal just how I dreamed, romantic and private. My other half gave me a beautiful ring. He admitted that it wasn’t the one he wanted to give to me as money was tight we both had problems at work. He said that he didn’t want something like a money to stop him from asking me to marry him. My current ring isn’t a diamond. He said that he wanted to save up and get me the ring he wanted to get me. Now a year on he is a new job that he loves doing and pays a lot more money and he wants to buy me a new engagement ring. I love my ring but he keeps pushing saying that he wants to I don’t know if I should let him or well and truly put my foot down and say no.Here is a picture of my current engagement ring