Post # 1
On Saturday I went to test drive a new car at my local Mercedes Benz dealership. I went with my fiancé. The salesman that helped me was nice. I went back by myself today to have my trade-in appraised and to test drive the car one more time before I started the buying process. Well, today the salesman made some pretty inappropriate and unprofessional comments that I did not appreciate. When we first got in the car, he said he would try to get me a good deal on the car because I would probably tell all my friends and bring in business and he said that a girl like me probably has a lot of single friends too and I could maybe “hook a guy up.” I thought that was strange but I kind of laughed and shrugged it off. While we were driving, he said that I am a “hot girl driving a hot car” and my “boyfriend” should be prepared for me to get hit on. While it is nice to be complimented, I think he took it a little too far. When he mentioned “boyfriend” again I corrected him and told him I was engaged. I brought up my fiancé a few more times and told him that we’re getting married in June. I also kept trying to change the subject back to the car and business talk and he kept talking about personal things. He also asked me what I do for a living and told me I looked like a Hooter’s girl. (Seriously? Nothing against Hooters girls but I consider myself pretty classy and I would never work at Hooters) I told him I am just a full time student and that I wasn’t sure if that was an insult or a compliment. (I was wearing an Underarmour shirt and yoga pants so it’s not like I had my legs showing and cleavage out or anything like that…) He told me it definitely wasn’t an insult and that I have long legs and a pretty face. He guessed that I was 18 years old and that I have a “baby face” -_- (By the way, I am actually 21 and he said he was 34) He was asking me about what is the “wildest thing I’ve ever done,” blah blah blah. I told him that I am a 4.0 student and he was saying that good girls are so rare etc etc… I didn’t really know what to say. It’s frustrating that because I am only 21, I sometimes don’t always get the respect I deserve from other people. I found his comments to be extremely disrespectful considering he met my fiancé and that didn’t stop him. He would’ve never said those things if my fiancé or my dad were there! This kind of thing should not happen at a luxury car dealership.
So, what should I do? I want to buy this car. Therefore, I am hesitant about reporting him to the general manager (his boss) immediately because I don’t want to make things awkward Wednesday when I go to buy the car. Maybe I should report it to the manager after the car is a done deal. One concern I have is about him thinking this is okay to do to any young, pretty girl that comes in alone. I do think he should be reprimanded. I just don’t know how to go about it.
I told my dad and he thought it was extremely unprofessional, but he recommended just letting it go. But, when I told my fiancé, he was infuriated and wanted to call the dealership first thing in the morning to report it. He wants me to get a new salesman and/or not do business with that dealership at all. But, I don’t want one sleazy guy to get in the way of the car I want.
I am thinking that I might talk to the general manager 1 on 1 first thing when I go in on Wednesday and just explain that some of his comments were concerning but I don’t want it to be dealt with while I am still there.
Post # 3
@ltj14: I would phone the manager first thing tomorrow morning. I would tell him what you have shared here and tell the manager that I am prepared to meet with him (the manager, not the sleazeball salesman).
I would tell the GM that I wanted to purchase the car but that I was not prepared to either purchase the car from or meet again with that salesman. I would request that the manager complete the sale himself. How he distributes the commission is up to him.
The GM needs to know how this salesman behaves with young female customers. He is exposing the dealership to possible legal action.
Post # 4
@ltj14: I’d do everything I can to make sure this guy doesn’t make a CENT off of your purchase. What a creep. Don’t worry about it being awkward, it’s his problem, not yours. He was inappropriate, unprofessional, and his boss needs to know. If you’re not comfortable calling him out, DEFINITELY go to another dealer.
Post # 5
@ltj14: I think you absolutely should report him. His comments were sleazy and disrespectful. I wouldn’t even worry about waiting till after buying the car, but if you are concerned about awkwardness, I suppose you could, but remember – this slimeball might get money off your purchase if you wait.
I hate to say it, but your Dad is part of an older generation and was probably around when making inappropriate remarks was a lot more normal and accepted, hence the divide between your fiance’s response and is. Do not feel like you are overreacting because of your dad’s view on this.
Post # 6
@julies1949: +1 Do it yourself, your FI wasn’t there.
It’s also helpful if you respond in a manner that immediately tells a person you do not think their comments are appropriate, but I know how hard that can be to actually do in the moment!
Post # 7
@julies1949: +1. This is extremely unprofessionnal and inappropriate.
Post # 9
Absolutely call and complain. That is completely innapropriate, and this guy needs a kick in the ass.
Post # 10
@ltj14: I would talk to the manager first thing when you walk in on Wednesday, tell him you feel as though said salesman does not deserve you business.
You will in no way halt your buying process, they want to sell cars! They will probably either offer you a bit more of a deal (seen it happen, when they’re scared of sexual harassment they sweat) and/or complete the deal with you outside of this salesman. He does NOT in any way deserve incentive for selling this car, and you need to tell the manager you feel that way, or he won’t get the picture and will continue to harrass girls…
I agree with your FI, I would be FURIOUS and so would my FI! Im young too, being 20 means I get treated like a child and as though I need to be babied, or pushed around, because I am so young.
Post # 11
@ltj14: I’m guessing think this was a deliberate sales ploy.
Assuming he’s been a car salesman for a while, he’s not stupid enough to be doing things which will harm his sales chances. So it’s either a technique to flatter you, or intimidate you. (By intimidate, I mean make you too uncomfortable). Either way, the goal is to stop you asking awkward questions about the car, or be less willing to negotiate, something like that.
So I’d think twice about buying that car, or even using that dealership. Since it’s a new car, I assume you can either (a) get the identical car at a different dealership, or (b) send your fiance in to start the buying process afresh with a new salesman.
p.s. So long as he’s selling cars, his manager won’t care. Still I would report him – after buying the car, so as not to cut out any of my options.
Post # 12
@julies1949: 100% agree. They are not NOT going to sell you a car because you complain about the salesman. The dealership wants your money.
Post # 13
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
@FutureMrsHallam: yes exactly!! OP, listen to this advice. You can still get your car ad deal with this creep. The first stuff could have been passable, but the hooters and “what’s the craziest thing you’ve done” comments are just grade A sexual harassment. NOT OK!
Also, lucky girl! I wish I had a Benz when I was 21!
Post # 14
@FutureMrsHallam: & @julies1949: are 100% on the money here.
You DO NEED to report this Salesman’s behaviour. And deal one-on-one with the Manager (infact that is what I’d ask for at this point in time)
Chances are good, they’ll make you a better offer.
And if you don’t get the feeling that they take your complaint seriously (cause you look younger than you are) … or it might be a case of the “old boys network” at work
There are other dealerships
A car is a BIG Purchase… and the car business cut-throat competitive (cause of the commissions)
Someone else should earn the sale / commission on the car you want to buy rather than this sleazy guy
(Cannot begin to tell you how INAPPRPROPRIATE the comment “Wildest thing you’ve ever done” was… never mind the Hooters reference)
Hope this helps,
And oh ya for future reference. In the future, when men say inappropriate things to you and make you feel uncomfortable DO NOT IGNORE THEM… ALLOW THEM to treat you this way (this is WHY they persist), it is what makes it harrassement / abusive.
Tell them outright that they are being INAPPROPRIATE… and if necessary REPORT THEM
And on another note, I never give out any personal info about myself to people like that I do not know… so no way in H3LL I’d had told him what I do for a living etc. None of his Effing business.
YOU DON’T OWE HIM ANYTHING…
He on the otherhand OWES you a lot… including COMMON COURTESY – POLITENESS etc as he is the guy looking for you to buy a car from him.
End of the day…
Grade = F.
Epic Fail !!
Post # 15
I would talk to the sales manager. Tell him what the car salesman said to you and ask to work with a different salesperson. Since you’re worried about running into him I would specify that you won’t do business with them if the first guy is at all involved.
Post # 16
@julies1949: Thanks, that is good advice. I agree with you.
@remijp: Thank you. My fiance said the same thing and doesn’t think he should make any money off of my purchase with how he acted.
@arabbel: Thank you and I agree. Although I probably should have said more about how my dad felt. He is certainly not okay with the comments the guy made, my dad and I have a very close relationship and it definitely upset him too. It’s not that he viewed it as okay, he just saw where I was coming from when I said I was afraid how it would be handled or it creating an awkward situation for me. But after he heard my fiance’s reaction, he agreed that I should report it.
@AB Bride: I agree that I should handle it myself. Yes, I wish I had said something to say to stop the comments, but thank you for understand that it is not an easy thing to do. Even now, I’m not sure about a good way to handle it. I tried to discourage him by talking about my fiance. I wish I would’ve told him I was offended by the Hooters comment. I DO NOT present myself in a way that warrants someone to think I work in a place like that.
@bowsergirl: Lol, my fiance would love to be the person to do that.
@FutureMrsHallam: Thanks, I agree.
@paula1248: That is certainly possible. I don’t have the best view of car salesmen. I do believe that they will often use manipulation techniques on people to get you to buy a car, so it is possible. The problem is that it’s not going to be easy to get the identical car at a different dealership. Well I could, but I will have to order it. This particular car model is brand new and selling like crazy.
@lolot: Thanks for your input, I agree. And lol, thank you. I have been saving up money for a while to be able to do this. I am fortunate and grateful to be able to buy a nice car.