Post # 1
I’m going back and forth with the idea of throwing my bouquet and can’t decide. We are having a very small wedding – about 50 guests and the majority of them are married. There will probably be 5-6 single ladies there and two of them are a bit older and divorced (do they try to catch it?). Do you think it’ll be awkward and weird to have such a small group of girls trying to catch this? Should I not even bother? Its not super important to me, but we already aren’t doing a first dance so I don’t want to start cutting out all of the traditional reception events…
We aren’t doing a first dance because I’m in a small, manual wheelchair since having nerve damage in one of my legs when I was 14. My mom really still wants me to do it and says it’ll be adorable, but seriously I think it would look absolutely ridiculous and honestly I don’t want everyone saying, “aww how cute.”
Post # 3
I’m not doing it for this specific reason. My MoH is married, one of my bridesmaids is in a relationship, one is single and the last is 11. I do not have a lot of female friends (Either on my side or my husband’s side), so we’re just opting not to do the garter/bouquet toss.
If you don’t want to do it for any reason, then don’t! It’s your wedding, you’re allowed to opt out of things.
Post # 4
I didn’t do this at mine, because that’s the worst part of the reception for anyone that’s single. I used to hate it and would stand in the back and as soon as it was tossed, turned on my heel and walked off. The only one’s at my wedding that were single that would have actually participated were probably all the teenage girls.
Post # 5
@adoc86: If it’s not important to you and you don’t think your guests would enjoy it, then it’s not necessary. I’ve been to some weddings where they have and haven’t thrown the bouquet and honestly if you asked me to list which were which, I couldn’t.
If it’s going to make you feel uncomfortable, then no, but if you feel comfortable with it and would want to ask any of the said single ladies for their opinion on it, it might give you a gauge on how it would be received. Someone really into it can really amuse the group– one wedding one of the BMs was so into it that she grabbed a GM to participate and it was really funny. But also, if no one really wants to then it’s kind of awkward.
Post # 6
I didn’t want to make my few single gals uncomfortable so we skipped it. I think most people skip it after the early 20s actually. Certain traditions – like putting the bride & groom to bed – are good to lose!
Regarding the first dance:
What about a first song/game/drink? http://offbeatbride.com/2009/09/first-dance-alternatives
Post # 7
Please don’t do it. I was a single lady at a wedding of about 110 people and was forced to get up there with 4 other single ladies. As we were assembled on the floor, the DJ called out “is that it!? Surely there are more single ladies!?”
Cue laughter from evvvveryone else there. It was pretty humiliating. I won’t be doing the bouquet toss at my own wedding, for that exact reason.
Post # 9
I’d just skip it. We didn’t do one, and it wasn’t missed at all. 🙂
Post # 10
I am doing a twist on the toss! Instead of all the single ladies we are goin to play a love song and ask all of those married couple to have a dance. Then the dj will tell the couple married a year or less to have a seat. 5 years or less. 10 years or less. And so and so until the longest married couple is left dancing then I will give my bouquet to her! I think it is such a sweet idea and it will help get couples on the dance floor too!
Post # 11
@FutureMrsBess: This is exactly what I was going to suggest! It’s a perfect solution for brides who have few single guests. Plus it’s so cute!
Post # 12
@adoc86: I saw or read somewhere about tossing the garter and or bouquet or both to the entire crown and attach a date night to it. Something like dinner and a maybe breakfast some where for the next morning etc. I think this will have more people gunning for it.
Post # 13
@avonleaR – I love this idea!
@– I love this idea, too!! Both of these options would allow us to still work it in, without it being so awkward.
@kay01 – I very much like these alternatives!! Thank you!
@LilacViolet – since you were personally in this position and found it humilating I can now promise you that we will for sure not do it (not the traditional way, anyway). I don’t want anyone to be embarassed!
Post # 14
oops, second one was @FutureMrsBess 🙂
Post # 15
I tossed a small, toss bouquet over my shoulder, outside, on my the way to our limo at the end of the evening. Since many guests had already left by that point, and most of my adult guests were already married, it was a free-for-all among the young girls. They had a lot of fun with it, and the young woman who caught it was about 13. We have some really cute pics of this. 🙂
Post # 16
@adoc86: I really love the idea of giving the bouquet to the longest married couple! I forgot to mention – I will be doing that instead of the traditional toss.