- 10 years ago
- Wedding: June 2012
I’ll try and be concise!
I’ve been friends with Mel for about 6 years. We’ve always been friendly, but were never best friends, and always had different circles of friends.
I asked her to be a bridesmaid when I first got engaged and am now regretting the decision. We have really grown apart since then and see each other maybe once/month for lunch even though we live 5 blocks away. She never asks about the wedding and I make a point not to talk about it. Additionally, she’s never been very supportive of my relationship and has pretty much said she thinks I’m making a mistake. She could barely muster a smile when I first broke the engagement news to her, which really hurt my feelings.
Truthfully, I think the only reason either of us make much of an effort (which is miniscule on both parts) to still hang out is BECAUSE she’s a bridesmaid. I’d like to talk to her about it – but I just don’t want to hurt her feelings. "Hi we’re not really friends anymore and I wanted to know if you would still come to my wedding but not be in it?" Umm… how is that conversation supposed to go?!?! I know money will be tight for her and have thought about maybe using that approach when I discuss it with her.
My FI doesn’t see the big deal and thinks I should keep her in the party. I guess my issue is that we’re just not that close anymore and I don’t see that changing in the next 6 months. If anything, the distance will continue to increase. For my part, I feel pretty indifferent towards her and the friendship at this point.