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Wear the ivory.
My groom's tux shop told him to wear ivory because my dress was ivory so he did (not happily). Our best man wore a pure white shirt/vest. If you look at my non pro pics (sorry you'll have to wade through my slideshow), I think the ivory shirt looks fine. Some of the pro pics make the best man's white shirt look too stark.
My dress is ivory, and our colors are Black and Champagne. I am trying to stay away from anything white. Although when we went to look at tuxes, the ivory shirts did look dirty and dingy.
Our wedding is going to be candlelit, so we went with the white shirt as it probably is a small detail that nobody will notice.
The groomsmen are wearing black shirts...so it is only my Fiance that will be in the white...
But I DO AGREE. The ivory shirts DO look dirty.
Our wedding is exactly like yours, ivory dress chocolate brown maid dresses. We chose ivory shirt/vest for my FI and ivory shirt/chocolate vest for the men. If your FI wears a white shirt/vest you could run into the issues as you said of looking 'dirty' however it would be your dress and not his shirt.
Personally when we made our decision the ivory swatches for the dress and vest matched perfectly. So as to not have a difference in shirt color between the guys we decided to have them wear ivory under their brown vests. Also, this is what the tux place suggested so that vote of confidence helped!
i think it depends on how ivory your dress is. mine was slightly offwhite and the tux shop guy convinced us to get ivory. i had a change of heart a few weeks later (ok, i was freaking out about ivory shirts) and made him change them to white. turns out my dress looked more white in the pics so the white shirt worked out.
similiar color scheme here: ivory dress, espresso bm dresses, expresso gm vests.
We've chosen ivory shirts. The shirts didn't look dingy and we felt it would look better to have everyone in similiar tones instead of in stark white. We're dealing with 3 tux shops and they all said the same: go with ivory.
I am wearing and Ivory dress and for pictures I did not want his bright white shirt make my dress look dirty so we went with Ivory shirt for the groom and white for the rest of the groomsmen. My girls are in deep purple.
Believe it or not, Ivory TENDS to be a little more elegant looking. White CAN be very bright which can actually look very stiff and thus look like not great fabric. Best thing would really be to look for yourself. I am sure that some Ivory really does look like it was rolled in teh mud, but then again some whites look like you fell into a deep bucket of bleach with a cheap shirt on.
I also agree that it depends on your dress, and also on what else the groom is wearing. My dress was diamond white, which is not really ivory - more likea cream color (not as yellow as ivory). DH wore a very dark blue suit with a pale lavender pinstripe. Ivory would have looked awful with his suit, and also would have looked much darker than my dress. The textured white shirt looks just a little whiter than my dress in most of the pictures - the dress looks creamy, as it was supposed to.
If you are afraid of the white shirt looking too white, going with a slightly textured fabric can help. Another thing to think about is how much you expect him to have his jacket off. ALL our formal pics were jacket-on. So you really see hardly any of the shirt. Our informal pics don't tend to have us plastered up against each other - so you don't see the shirt and the dress in sharp contrast. Plus, as another person said, the light makes a big difference. Ours was an evening wedding, so the light tended to be soft. I think it's mostly if you have bright, bright light that the whites get really stark looking.
I am still not really sure what to do. Our ceremony is outside, but in the afternoon and the reception will be inside, with a dimly lit room (lit mostly with candlelight).
I had an outdoor ceremony and indoor reception. My dress was ivory and champagne. My husband bought an ivory shirt for his tux. The color was so subtle -- I thought he looked fabulous.
I have no idea where everyone gets this idea that ivory looks dirty -- maybe they should look into finding a new drycleaner?!?
When I went to the Men's Wearhouse to look at their ivory shirt, it was EXTREMELY ivory. Dingy, yellow ivory. Not a subtle splash of ivory.
Agree with some of the other posts... it depends how "ivory" your ivory is. I'm wearing a davids bridal ivory. I took a picture next to a manequin in a white shirt, it looked fine.
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My dress is ivory and the bridesmaids' dresses are chocolate brown.
But I heard somewhere that ivory shirts can tend to look "dirty." Now that I told that to my fiance he wants a white shirt and now I am thinking ivory would be best (because now that's what the tux place is suggesting).
What does the hive think?