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If you really have your heart set on having the wedding and inviting all your family members and friends to share in your special day, I say go for it! There are PLENTY of ways you can cut costs and cut corners so that your wedding isn't an outrageous financial burden. Maybe put half the money you received from your parents toward the wedding, and half toward the honeymoon or house.
However, if you're like me and are just having the wedding for your family members...elope. Invite your parents, have a beachside wedding and then, on your return, throw a casual shindig in your family member's yard- maybe a cookout or something simple and cheap.
You'll only get married once, so make it memorable. That doesn't translate into "spend everything you have"- it just means that you should find a happy medium between making you happiest and making your wallet happiest.
I would say scale things back, maybe only have a small wedding and reception. I think that you can always cut back on things. Have a backyard reception or just cake or something.
bridesmaid_dress.jpg (11 KB, 61 downloads) 1 year old 
My only concern about the destination wedding is that it puts a huge financial burden on your parents. With the extra money they would be spending to travel to the Caribbean, it seems like you could throw a scaled back cocktail/appetizers only reception in your family member's backyard and perhaps cut the guestlist to only family and perhaps a few of your closest friends?
I'm with the other ladies, I dont see any harm in scaling back your wedding. I think it's a really valid concern with the economy the way it is and with it not looking like it's changing anytime soon. It would be much more beneficial to you to put your money into some other investments.
I don't think eloping is the best thing for you. If you were planning a wedding, you'll be sad to not have one in the end. But that's just my opinion.
Thanks Bees!
I think maybe we'll move the date up, cut back on the list and scale back on the food (were thinking of a clambake, maybe now do BBQ - not burgers & dogs BBQ, but chicken & steak tips).
Now to talk to FH tonight. He didn't want to wait so long for the wedding, so I think he'll be on board.
Thanks! =)
What would make you most happy? Eloping? A destination wedding with only your nearest and dearest? A big party with all your friends and family? In ten, fifteen, twenty years...what memories do you want to look back on? Saving money is always a good thing to do but you should be able to host a traditional wedding, should you choose that route, within a reasonable budget. You just have to be careful with your spending and not get carried away. My suggestion would be to not put anything on credit cards. Keep in mind though that a trip to the Caribbean isn't the cheapest thing either..and if you do that and invite your parents, it might look bad if you don't pay for their tickets seeing as how they have given you money already.
Decision has been made and....
We scaled back the guest list and moved up the date! I'm so happy with the decision, and so are our families. Lots were accomplished this weekend toward planning. I now have my gown ($250 @ Goodwill's Brides on a Budget event in Boston this weekend), we met with the photographer today and are meeting with a caterer next Sunday. OH! And I bought the Save the Date's - 100 for just under $11.00 on Vista Print. Lots accomplished and yet still lots to do - and I'm loving it all. =)
Congrats! You've been very productive. Isn't it great when saving money means getting married sooner?
Man, I wish I could make decisions as fast as you! I'm envious as to how much you have accomplished in the last few days!
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Hi Bees,
I've got some serious thinking to do. My FH and I are both only children. We are both 31 yrs old. We were planning on marrying June 2010 (100 guests/outdoor reception in family members yard). We have a date held at a church (for the space only, a family member was/is marrying us). We have only put down $200 in deposits (on the DJ) and signed no other contracts. We have been given $ from both sets of parents for the wedding or whatever we want to put it towards (house). The only stipulation was we need to go on a nice honeymoon.
Then the recession hit and while I still have a job, my salary has been reduced.
I'm really nervous about spending the money on the wedding. I keep thinking the smart thing to do would be to take a trip to the Caribbean and just get married there. Tell our parents and see if they would like to go? Maybe have a party when we return? I'm not thrilled about this, but I'm really scared about my financial security.
What to do, what to do??? I'd love to hear some feedback.