(Closed) Should we give them a key?

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: Do you think it's a good idea to let parents have a key to your home?
    yes : (67 votes)
    68 %
    no : (32 votes)
    32 %
  • Post # 3
    520 posts
    Busy bee

    Well, I think you know your parents best and know if they are the “snooping” type.  If you do give them a key, it would be best to hid anything that they shouldn’t happen upon in the event that they do snoop.  Mom doesn’t need to see sex toys ~ lol.

    Post # 4
    1897 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Oddly enough, I think it depends on the parents.   We would give my parents a key—they would NEVER use it except for times we needed them to/asked them to.


    FI’s parents?  Well, we can imagine them saying “oh, I dropped some groceries off when no one was home for you!”  or “I went over, and you weren’t home, so I just went in for a bit to play with the kitty”  Or, “I waited til you weren’t home to go inside and decorate the house for a surprise birthday party”   


    Yeah, all nice gestures, but I wouldn’t want it.  I like privacy in my home!

    Post # 5
    5977 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Both of our parents have keys to our house, and so does my brother. The parents b/c they live far enough away that we don’t really need to worry about them just popping in while we’re not home. But, it makes them feel secure. And my brother and SIL have one b/c they’re pretty close to us…so if anything ever happens where we lock ourselves out, they’re close enough to run it over if we need it.

    I think that if you feel uneasy, maybe you should let them know a close friend is going to stop by for you to water the plants, but you appreciate the offer.

    Post # 6
    624 posts
    Busy bee

    Mother-In-Law and my grandmother have a key to our house.  We’ve never had any issues with them just showing up unannounced but as far as snooping goes, I don’t know.  They both live far enough away now that they would be of no help during an emergency.

    How about compromise: give them the key to water but then ask for it back nicely after you return?

    Post # 7
    916 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2010 - Al Cielo / La Laguna

    We keep a key box on our house so if in an emergency we can give whoever the code to open it to get the key.  We don’t actually give any keys to anyone.

    Post # 8
    165 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Both our parents have a key to our house and I feel more comfortable than them not. I guess it all depends on your parents and in-laws and how they act. I know neither of ours would ever snoop and would only take care of what we asked them too. It’s comforting knowing they have keys because if we are ever out of town and forgot to do something, they can take care of it for us. I think we just have a level of respect where they don’t snoop, just as we have keys to their houses and don’t snoop either.

    Post # 9
    1585 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    My parents have a key to our house but they would never use it unless they needed to like if we were out of town and I asked them to go there. 

    Flip it around do you have a key to their house.  Both my Fiance and I have keys to my parents house.

    Post # 10
    2867 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I think this decision is based soley on the parents. If they’re the type who would stop by your house while your out of town to make sure your basement didn’t leak – then it’s all good. Plus there’s someone who can let you in an emergency.

    If they’re the type the don’t understand boundaries and see a key as an open invitation to just pop by whenever or possibly be waiting there when you get home for work…then a resounding NO.

    Post # 11
    1684 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    I dunno if I’ll be of any help because – well… my dad owns the 2fam house we live in. There’s an old woman who lives downstairs and we’re upstairs.

    I’m actually REALLY glad my Dad has a key. Last week I locked myself out – Fiance was at the Pearl Jam concert & the woman downstairs wasn’t home. Yep – I had to call my Dad to let me into my own house! Hah!

    Post # 12
    1995 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I’m planning on giving my parents a key to our apartment for our wedding weekend.  We’re leaving for our honeymoon early and they’re going to drop off our items left from the wedding in the morning.  They live out of state so I don’t have to worry about them dropping in.  Just make sure to hide anything you dont want seen!

    Post # 13
    713 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    i voted yes, but like others have said, only YOU know your family. My parents have our key but its for emergencies.  Or it is just easier if we are meeting after work for my mom to let herself in. Or my dad has hung shelves and done work…  For me, its a no brainer they would have a key. My cousin who lives down the street also has a key, again, for emergencies.. in case i lose mine or we are locked out…

    Post # 14
    2015 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    I would without hesitation give either of our parents keys to our place. But I trust them completely, and on the off chance they went snooping, we’re all prett open about things, so I probably wouldn’t care because I know they wouldn’t pass judgement. Plus, what will they find? Condoms in our nightstand? Oh no, scandal! 🙂

    There are some people I wouldn’t give our key to, though. I have some cousins I wouldn’t trust just because they’re flaky, and I would worry they would leave our door unlocked or something.

    Post # 15
    4001 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I’d be ok with it, I also know not only would my parents not snoop, but there isn’t much to find!  I can’t imagine what a parent would be looking for.  I think parents are the only ones I’d trust to have a key, for emergency purposes.

    Post # 16
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Totally depends…my Mother-In-Law has a key to our home for emergencies. She checks on our cats for us and everything when we’re out of town. She would never snoop, though.

    The topic ‘Should we give them a key?’ is closed to new replies.

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