Should you run this by your spouse or not?!?

posted 3 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: Does a visit from the in-laws warrant running it by your spouse first?
    Yes : (405 votes)
    89 %
    No : (50 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 3
    13256 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I expect at least 30 minutes notice if anyone that doesnt live at the house is going to show up.

    Post # 4
    9412 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    @isthisreallyreal:  It’s a family home so anyone who is invited over needs to be a decision by both people – at least in my world. 

    Post # 5
    11668 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999


    Post # 6
    7273 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Big fat yes! When inviting anyone over I expect him to check with me, or (worst case) tell me ASAP after inviting them so I have lots of warning.

    BTW this became more important once we had kids.

    Post # 7
    804 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @isthisreallyreal:  I would like a little notice, but I’d roll with it if it was a quite visit from the in laws.

    Post # 8
    8739 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Not really, no. I do like at least 30 minutes notice for any visitors, but since we live so far away from our parents we generally know when they’re coming.

    Post # 9
    5333 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @isthisreallyreal:  I typically expect a day’s heads up of visitors so that I can make sure the house is clean.  This may not alwasy be practicaly possible, but I prefer it.

    Post # 10
    15070 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    We would, but that’s our agreement/understanding. Both of our families always call anyways. I’ve lived with people where we had the opposite understanding. It’s something the couple has to decide based on comforts of the couple and family dynamics outside the couple.

    Post # 11
    724 posts
    Busy bee

    I personally wouldn’t mind if a parent or sibling came by without a heads up.

    But, if you do mind, it’s not unreasonable that he give that prior notice.

    Post # 12
    7298 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Absolutely yes.

    Post # 13
    613 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    @isthisreallyreal:  I wouldn’t say we “run it by” each other, that makes it sound like you need the other persons permission first, which in our relationship we don’t. We would simple just tell one another and be like “x is coming over soon”, if there was a time I didn’t feel like having the company then that’s my issue and I can either leave the house or stay in another room, I would never tell him he can’t invite his family over to our home.


    Post # 14
    1892 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @isthisreallyreal:  yes. I expect a head up for anyone… Bc he’s known to tune stuff out… So if we already have plans he forgot about… 

    Post # 15
    43300 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    A Head’s up before the invitation is extended would be my expectation. I may have other plans. Our home is always ready for company, but I’m not. I might be plannng to color my hair or do my toes.

    Post # 16
    2783 posts
    Sugar bee

    doesn’t matter who it is, if someone’s coming over I needed to be asked/informed first.

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