Should Your Dress Cater To Your Fiance's Taste?

posted 2 years ago in Dress
Post # 2
Member
716 posts
Busy bee

My advice would be to stop discussing the dress with your fiance.  You are an adult woman and you get to decide what you wear.  It is your dress.  What is your fiance’s is a lifetime partnership with you, the person.  The dress, in contrast, is yours, it is on your body and it should represent you as you see fit.

Post # 3
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

jamb:  +1.  In the end, your SO is going to LOVE you in whatever dress you end up with.

That being said, I would suggest trying on a variety of styles– even ones you never thought you’d like. Having been around the Bee for even less than a year, you’d be shocked how many end up with dresses they never thought they’d like!

Post # 4
Member
8425 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think it depends, if you’ve already got an idea of what you want/feel good in, I would go with that.  However, I was never the type of girl to think about weddings or dresses, so when it came time to choose my wedding dress, my groom was the deciding factor.  I think no matter what style dress you choose, your FI will think you’re beautiful on your wedding day.

Post # 5
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

As an avid viewer of “My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding”–and I can’t believe I just admitted that but oh, well, it’s the Internet–I can tell you that the dress you like does not remind me of that show in the least. I think it’s lovely! You know what else I think? I think you should get the dress YOU want and not worry about what your FI may or may not think. It sounds as though he will find anything wider than a sheath too pouffy, so just get what you like. My DH hates one-shoulder dresses but that didn’t stop me from trying one on anyway. I didn’t end up choosing that one but if it had been my dream dress I would have bought it and not felt bad about it in the least. Your FI won’t care as much about what you have on as you (or he) think he will–he’ll think your gorgeous anyway.

Post # 7
Member
1948 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

My DH-then-FI asked me not to get a big poofy dress – he hates them.  I had always envisioned myself in a ballgown.  He said he would love it no matter what I wore and it was up to me, but in my heart, there was no way I was getting a ballgown after he said that.  I didn’t want the slightest hint of ‘what if he doesn’t like my dress’ on our wedding day.  DH did not have many requests about the wedding, but this was one of them.  And afterall, it’s a day about us as a couple, and what better way to start our marriage off with a compromise instead of being selfish!

Post # 9
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

<br />I definitely considered what my finace (now husband) would like when I chose my wedding dress.  I didn’t want to look pretty for my guests.  I wanted to look pretty for him.  If he told me he difinitely did not like a certain style, I would not choose that style.

Post # 10
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

 

liameowchelle:  I think you are on the right path feeling like you should compromise on your wedding dress…..

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by  NavyBee.
Post # 11
Member
290 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

liameowchelle:  Hello!  I personally want my FI to think I look lovely on my wedding day – I almost took him dress shopping!.  What he thinks is more important to me than what any other guest thinks, so I definitely took his tastes/preferences into consideration when dress shopping.  I think you could definitely find a princess dress without such a full skirt.  For example, my FI hates big “poofy” dresses, but I still went for an a-line with a full skirt.  He loves it (I couldn’t resist and showed him a photo!).  I’m sure you can find something that would make you both happy.  Another thing to remember is this – men sometimes can’t separate you from the model in the pic.  My FI kept hating dresses but when I covered the face of the model, he liked them! He just couldn’t imagine them on me.  I mentioned this to my friend and she said her husband was the same! 

Post # 12
Member
2595 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

liameowchelle:  I’m sure that there’s a way of having your ballgown without worrying about his tastes not being catered for. 

IMHO, a ballgown with pickups or lots of flounces or poof on the skirt looks a much bigger dress than something with simpler lines. It could be the flounce/poofiness, rather than the size of the skirt, that he’s really objecting to. My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding dresses tend to have a lot of poof and flounce, for a start.

Something that, as you said, is more like an a-line and maybe isn’t overloaded with detail sounds like something that could work for you (and, IMHO, is a more timeless look as well – less is more sometimes).

In the Maggie Sottero brand, I would be thinking something like this:

or this, if you suit a natural waist:

The other thing you can do is to ramp up the sexiness – whether that’s with a drop waist, plunging neckline or open back – so that his jaw will be so open that he won’t goddamn care about the rest of your dress LOL.

Post # 13
Member
2261 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Well, I showed my FI my dress before I even bought it. I was showing him a few gowns and I remember him saying my dress was blah, too princessy and not me. Little does he know……I fell in love with it the instant I put it on and bought it a couple of weeks after his comment. 

A few months after, we were on the couch watching TV and I started showing him dresses again. My dress showed up again (same exact picture as before) and all of a sudden he liked it, he said that dress was very sweet and really liked the shape of it. 

Moral of the story……. men don’t pay attention to this nonsense. They see a dress and all they really focus on is the model lol. Buy the dress that YOU want. Your FI is going to be too nervous and focused on your face when you walk down the aisle, he won’t eve realize it is the same dress he was hating on a year before the wedding. 

Post # 14
Member
1670 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I didn’t avoid dresses because of his taste, but when I found the dress, part of the reason I knew it was the one was because not only did I love it and feel gorgeous in it, but I knew he would LOVE it. 

I know he’d think I was beautiful no matter what, but I totally had him in mind while shopping.

Post # 15
Member
4596 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think every couple is different. Watching every episode of “Say Yes to the Dress”, it’s interesting to see how many brides are concerned with how their SO will react to their dress, and how some go for a style that their SO wants and not what they actually want. If his opinion matters to you, maybe a compromise can work between a couple different style of dresses.

My FI was telling me a story about an ex of mine (whose wedding he was in as an usher), and that my ex made his now wife return the first dress she bought cos he didn’t like it. My first thought was that seemed very controlling… and I’m glad I didn’t have to worry about that!

I have showed a dress similar to mien to my FI and he liked it. Will he like the one that I atually bought? I hope so!

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors