(Closed) Shower last week, wedding next week – thank you cards now?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1816 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I am of the camp that you should send a separate thank you card for each gift, and send the card as soon as possible.  However, since you are SO close to the wedding, I think it is ok to hold off until after to send the thank yous out.  No need to add more stress to your plate, and I am sure that your shower attendees understand you are super busy this week.

Post # 5
1570 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

Seven days is just too short a turnaround to write all those thank-you notes during such an intense time. Write them when you get back.

Post # 6
1872 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think that you’re fine for sending one thank you note to each person–just be sure to mention both the shower and wedding gifts so both are acknowledged.

You’re a lucky girl!

Post # 7
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I would send out thank you notes for the shower gifts you just received.  My guests received their shower thank you notes and wedding invites the same day.  I just recieved my friend’s shower thank you notes – and her wedding was 6 weeks ago, shower was 2 months ago.

Do it now so you won’t forget~

Post # 8
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I don’t see any reason why you need to stress about getting them all done before the wedding.   I’d be sure to get your list organized and leave it at that until after the wedding festivities!    People will understand.

Post # 9
866 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

This is a case where etiquette and practicality can go hand-in-hand, as long as you’re careful. None of your shower guests should be expecting a thank-you note until after your wedding, with the exception of the hostess — she needs a note and small gift immediately.

When you write your notes post-wedding, be sure to thank the appropriate people. Example: female relative attends shower, gives gift. She and her husband attend wedding, give gift. The thank-you for them should include specific thanks to female relative for attending the shower and the gift, then thank the couple for attending the wedding and that gift.

Basically, it’s more the content of the note than the specific timing. A bland “thanks for everything!” won’t suffice, but as long as sincere thanks and details are included, you’ll be just fine.

And… best wishes on your wedding!!

Post # 10
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I agree with some of the other posters that you shouldn’t stress yourself out more with extra thank-yous.  I’m sure they know you’re grateful, and busy! Just mention their shower gift or whatever along with the wedding thank you.  I wouldn’t mind, as long as one gift doesn’t go un-noticed.  I went to a wedding and shower this summer and only ever got a thank you card for the wedding gift.

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