Post # 1
I’m in need of some advice about a situation that has come up and would appreciate some ideas.
I am getting married on April 13th. Most of my family and guests are coming from across the country, or else live several hours away. My fiances family is local, however with the exception of his aunt has been pretty hands off throughout the planning process
FI and I have lived together for a few years and really don’t need or want too many things, and also don’t really have the space for “stuff” that isn’t necessary, so opted for a honeymoon registry.
last week I was approached by a church member who told me that several members are wanting to give me a wedding shower, and want to know where I am registered. They know I am having a very small wedding and are not expecting to be invited to the wedding. I am not a member of this church, but have been employed there as a musician for about a year and a half. I was really touched by their generosity, and agreed to let them give us a shower since we Didn’t have one planned.
Now the dilemma: this is a much older congregation and they are very conservative. I got the impression that they were expecting a traditional registry By their questions. I was thinking of setting up a very limited registry at some place like bed, bath, and beyond with just the necessities and still keeping the honeymoon registry which most of our guests already know about.
Thoughts? your ideas are greatly appreciated!
Post # 3
@MrsKelloggtobee: I think that sounds like a good idea.
Post # 4
That sounds like a plan. A work shower is fairly common thing, with no expectation that all these people will be invited. As for the registry, for what it’s worth, at my work shower they passed around a card/envelope and picked up one of the more expensive items as a group gift.
If you think they’ll actually do individual gifts and are a bit older, I’d probably try to put lots of items in the $10-15 range, as that’s what I’d likely contribute to a work shower group gift, and probably wouldn’t want to spend much more than that if I got my own gift.
Post # 5
@MrsKelloggtobee: I agree with above, it’s fairly common with co-workers. give them a registry that you make for them, then after the event deactivate it.
Post # 7
I agree with everything everyone else said regarding the shower.
However – you might want to consider having SOME sort of material-good registry for your wedding guests. Not having one could back-fire with a lot of off-registry items, because there are a lot of people (myself included, and older generations) who like to give actual presents. Whether it’s China or luggage or something you might not need for 10+ years. Or, choose a place like Bloomingdales and register for whatever — and if you decide you don’t want it, the store credits can later go for furniture or things you end up needing down the line (like pretty dresses! just kidding…sort of).
I know a lot of people who had very minimal (or no) registries (wanting money) — and instead got a lot of bowls and things they didn’t want and couldn’t return as easily. I think it’s nice to just pick one store with easy returns (total side note: Bed Bath and Beyond has HORRIBLE registry return policies) — bloomingdales or crate & barrel or even tiffanys (I say Tiffany’s because I know a couple that exchanged all of their Tiffany’s shower presents to pay for their engagement rings…not sure how I feel about that – but always an option?!).
so yes, bottom line, I think you need to register at a store you like to avoid presents that you won’t know what to do with. 🙂