SIL engaged and didn\'t tell us!?

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 2
954 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

globalmargaret:  I would most definitely call her out on it and send that text. But it might not be the most popular opinion here on the Bee!

Post # 3
6969 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Maybe she’s waiting to see you in person to tell you?

Post # 4
609 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Thats kinda shitty that she didnt tell you guys… Was there a falling out or hard feelings? Maybe just ask her….

Post # 5
1272 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

globalmargaret:  I would call her out on it. If she realizes that you know, she might go ahead and let all of the family know. I’d be trying to protect her poor mom from finding out through someone else…that would be so sad!

Post # 6
9859 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

I would totally call her out on it ‘hey, word on the street is congratulations are in order?’

Post # 7
1762 posts
Buzzing bee

globalmargaret: Honestly it hasn’t even been a week yet, and there must be a reason why she hasn’t shared her big news yet, so I wouldn’t make her feel bad or ackward about it. I would give her a little more time to tell you herself before “calling her out”. I know it can be confusing and hurtful to find out such major news from someone other than your SIL. I’m sure we all have things that we have shared with our friends before before our family for varying reasons! She might want to make the announcement personally, or plan a get together. Either way, she is allowed to have her reasons.

I would give her a little more time, and then (if you have the type of relationship in which you talk on the phone) call and tell her that you heard from so and so that she was engaged and that you wanted to congratulate her. I would make sure it’s in a genuinely excited and friendly way. She may then feel inclined to share more details or even explain her reasons for delaying the her announcement 🙂


Post # 8
941 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Maybe she has a perfectly good reason for not telling you all yet? Maybe she is waiting for an opportunity to have the whole family together to tell everyone at the same time. I guess you could say something since word is getting around but I wouldn’t do it in the tone of “calling her out”

Post # 9
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Yeah, sure, send that text calling out your SIL and risk pissing her off.  Maybe the guy who said something to you wasn’t supposed to ruin a potential surprise.  Or maybe she and her FI wanted to tell you in person and show off the ring.  Maybe she isn’t the type who goes batshit crazy over getting engaged.  Instead of thinking she did it to slight you, how about giving her the benefit of the doubt?    

Post # 11
1762 posts
Buzzing bee

globalmargaret:  That sounds like the PERFECT way to do it 🙂

I think it’s fine to be honest with her about your hurt feelings, she may honestly have a valid reason that will make you feel better! If not, try to remember that it’s not about you and just look forward to the fun festivities ahead 🙂

Good Luck!!

Post # 12
3637 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I’m hoping that she was just planning to tell the family altogether or something but that her FI (or his family!) had a big mouth and told lots of people. 

Hopefully she tells you all officially soon. 

Leave a comment

Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors