- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
I'd address ALL mail to her with her married name ... she will learn pretty quick that way
Wow that's so rude of her! You respect her decision to not change her name but she won't respect that you changed yours. I would just keep signing things as Mrs. Smith, I don't think there is anything you can say to her to make her address you by the proper name.
Talk to her before it becomes a huge issue and you hold it in too long.
Is she aware that you took his name? She may actually be trying to not offend you by doing that in case you didn't take his name.
@klb5882 and @greeneyedmoon She doens't like me (or my husband) and doesn't talk to us, even when we try to talk to her. It's really bizarre but she acts like we're not even in there when we say anything to her. I should maybe try talking to my brother about it, but she kind of controls him and he seems afraid to stand up to her. Plus, my brother and I don't have the best relationship either.
Sorry to hear she is disrespecting you like this. I think she is doing it because she doesn't like you, and this is a way for her to show her distaste. Frankly I would try to not worry about it. It will be very hard to correct someone who's messing up your name out of malice, whereas it would be easier to correct someone who messes it up out of ignorance or negligence. Because to get her to stop, you would have to get her to stop disliking you or to start respecting you, and I don't think there are many ways of achieving that when people are set in their ways.
:-( sorry, than! I was hoping it was just a misunderstanding. I'd honestly just mention it to her casually, and laugh it off - otherwise you'll stew about it, and it'll become a much bigger issue than it needs to!
I love it! haha
I like the idea of addressing all of her stuff as Mrs. Married Name. See if she says something to you about it, and if she does then throw it out there that you'd like to be addressed as Mrs. Married Name, not Maiden Name.
In your next correspondence to her, regardless of the subject, include a footnote reminding her that you changed your name in a friendly way. "By the way, just wanted to let you know that my name is now Mrs. X!" Hopefully that will work or she will just eventually get the hint that you are going by a new name now.
It is one of my biggest pet peeves when people address me by the wrong name or spell my name wrong (when they see it clearly spelled out in an email they are replying to). I can understand if people don't know that I got married or haven't confirmed that I changed my name, but I think the slightest effort should be made to address others correctly, espcially by a SIL!!
I wouldn't worry about it, or confronting her. She sounds like she's spiteful and is trying to piss you off. I don't know her, but confronting her probably won't change that. Just pretend that it doesn't bother you, and she might even stop trying to bother you.
I agree with the footnote idea. If she doesn't get the hint after that, she's being intentionally rude. From the sound of her other behaviour, it doesn't seem like she's the type of person who you're particularly close to anyway, so if she continues, you and your DH can have a private giggle over her pettiness.
i agree with the footnotes. besides signing your married name on everything,
@michkarose: Send it back, "Return to sender, adressee unkown"
What a wonderful idea! Haha! Though seriously, There is not much you can do. Don't fuel the fire by also signing with her married name, which she does not use. You do not have to stoop to that level.
Though I would be a 'pain in her ass' everytime she sends me something by calling her or everytime I must see her, I would remind her. "By the way, you sent my mail with the wrong name." Do this however many times it takes and say each subsequent time with more and more conviction on how she need not be so mean. You want to have a decent relationship with her and you expect to give the same to her.
But stand your ground. Always. ESPECIALLY in front of 'bitch n' a half' women. (My SIL comes to mind!) The sooner you correct hostility, the better. Otherwise they will use 'habit' as an excuse to continue their stupidity.
I suppose you could address all her mail to Miss Poopypants.... or just realize that she doesn't like you, you don't like her, so leave it. It's almost not worth your time to address it, and if she's being petty, she might get a simple rise out of knowing it irks you.
@mg1363: I know this is super old but I just had to respond that putting her married name on everything would be perfect! Give her a taste of her own medicine.
Yep, I'd vote "passive aggressive attempt to get on your nerves", and it appears to be working :)
I don't think I'd respond by stooping to her level, but am torn between reminding her publicly that you changed your name, and just ignoring it.
For her birthday get her address labels printed with her name as she likes it and a set with your name as you like it with a note saying you hope this will help her remember your choice to change your name. :)
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| hisgoosiegirl | 34 |
| MissBoPeep | 29 |
| Gemstone | 24 |
| Mrs.KMM | 24 |
| Beckster329 | 23 |
| beargoose | 20 |
| BetterSherm | 20 |
| Rivendeler | 20 |
| ndreighton | 19 |
| KCKnd2 | 16 |
Sorry, there are no users yet.
My SIL did not take my brother's name when they got married. I have respected her choice and address all mail to her with her maiden name. However, she is not respectful of the fact that I chose to take my husband's last name and addresses all mail to me with my maiden name. How do I get her to stop doing this?