Post # 1
I love my nephew, I truly do. That being said, my SIL gets on my last nerve. In the first couple of months following his birth my SIL would send up to 3 pics a day to my phone (and other family members as well). I loved seeing the pictures.
Well, my nephew is now 6 months…and while I still get pictures and enjoy them, it seems lately that if I don’t respond to them she sends even more. I’m not sure why that is the situation. I notice if I say “So adorable!” or anything like that, she sends pics much less (like every few days). But for example today I didn’t respond and she send 4 pictures and 1 video all within a few hours. To be honest, I feel that she is trying to rub everything in my face knowing that I haven’t had my first child yet and she in a sense beat me to it—trust me she is a VERY competetive person (I won’t go into the details).
So at any rate, I HATE when people become like this because I feel everything in life has its own pace and well…right now I am having issues TTC with my husband and it is heartbreaking. While I do like to see pics of my nephew, it is not easy to be reminded of my lack on a daily basis and when I do try to just ignore the pics by not responding I just get more and more of it.
I don’t know what to do about it. Should I be fake and just respond a lot (kill her with kindness) or just keep ignoring ALL of the pics/videos?
Post # 3
Have you thought of expressing your feelings to your sister? I would hope that as your sister, she isn’t intentionally trying to make you feel bad or inadequate. Perhaps, if you tell her a little about your struggles (without attacking her for sending pictures). try to stay neutral in the convo and just talk to her. I bet she hasn’t even thought in that direction.
Post # 4
@Armina33: Is it possible that she is just really excited about her baby? Many moms that I know send tons and tons of pictures of their child.
Post # 5
Have a conversation with her about your struggles. If she still bombards you with 10x daily photos then she is a real cow.
Post # 6
@MrsFireChief: She’s not my sister–she is married to my brother. And unfortunately we don’t have a close relationship. She is very secretive and highly competetive.
Post # 7
I would just response once a while because that’s still your nephew, but don’t reply too often, she will get bored when she doesn’t get enough attention.
Trust me, I know how u feel. I have a SIL who always compare herself to me and put me down a lot too. To the point my mother in law have to say to her that she always put my SIL before me so my SIL don’t get jealous! I mean, c’mon! How old is she to do such things?
and one more thing, I’m having issues having kids with my husband as well… I know how u feel… I’m dying for a baby!
Post # 8
If you don’t want to talk to her about it, I would just respond if I felt compelled to. If something was like particularly cute or whatever. Hopefully she isn’t doing it to be passive aggressive and just excited for her baby and it’s coincidental when she sends extras.
Post # 9
@housebee: I’m sure she is very excited–but to send the same looking pictures every time where you literally cannot see the difference between one and another tells me that she is doing this for another reason. It’s one thing to send unique pics (like first smile, first xmas pictures, first halloween, first bath, etc)….but the same thing over and over again I feel she is trying to rub it in.
I am 5 years old than her so in a way she is really convinced that I’m upset that she had a child before me–she doesn’t say it to me but I can FEEL it each time.
Post # 10
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
I vote option 4, tell her that while you absolutely love your little nephew, it’s hard to see so many pictures while you’re having fertility struggles. Unless you haven’t told her about that.
Otherwise, make an excuse about your phone filling up too fast / data being used too quickly?
Sorry about all this :/
Post # 11
I actually agree with MrsFireChief…you should see my face book album of my dogs, and they are both now past 2 (since dec 17!)
Post # 12
I’d probably start sending the same response to EVERY pic, and see if she figures out that she’s completely overloading you. Something like “Cute ;)”
But if it’s REALLY bothering you (which I would totally understand), you could always talk to your brother about how you’re secretly TTC and having issues, and that you can’t handle getting more than X pictures per week.
Post # 13
I wish I got that many photos of my nephew.
Post # 14
I would respond to ALL the pics with the same exact candid response. maybe she’ll eventually get bored with how you respond! “ugh all she ever says is OMG CUTE, so lame”
Post # 15
Juher ask her to remove you from that list of recipients. Let her think what she wants.
Post # 16
@Armina33: I can see how that would get annoying. Can you see the pics any other way? If so, I say just responding “Cute” to everything, especially if you feel like you’d be wasting your breath if you talked to her about your struggles to TTC.