(Closed) Single Bridezillas?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: New Bridezilla trend Crazy or Acceptable?
    Absolutely downright cray cray no questions asked : (89 votes)
    51 %
    Totally Acceptable (Bought the dress, found the venue now all we need is a groom any takers?) : (3 votes)
    2 %
    Acceptable within reason (It's okay to have a vision or scrapbook with ideas) : (82 votes)
    47 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5012 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    It’s one thing to have a dream wedding, but to be buying a dress or deciding on centrepieces without even having a boyfriend is absolutely, completely and utterly nuts. It’s losing sight of what a wedding is really about.

    Post # 4
    Member
    7610 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Wow, I just….really?  Venues before a boyfriend!?

    I agree with what SpecialSundae: said about losing sight.  Having a scrapbook of ideas seems completely reasonable to me (although I didn’t have anything like that), but full-on planning seems like a risky venture.

    Post # 5
    Member
    55 posts
    Worker bee

    Me and some of my friends (some single, some not), sometimes muse about what kind of dress we’d like or what kind of veil or things like that. I sometimes even ask my boyfriend his opinion on things. I read the boards on this site. But that’s it.
    I think that it’s okay to pick dresses and colors and maybe flowers and stuff like that and put the ideas in a scrapbook or on pinterest, but going to the point of buying stuff  and looking at venues is getting a little craycray.
    What if your future fiance doesn’t want the wedding you’re planning on? At the end of the day, the wedding isn’t just about the bride. It’s the couple’s day.
    THEREFORE, I believe that musing or dreaming is fine, but going to the point of purchasing is ridiculous because being single, you don’t have an idea yet of what your future fiance might want his wedding to look like and you can’t just assume that you’re going to get everything you planned on.

    Post # 6
    Member
    3183 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I worry that these people are going to rush into relationships with people that aren’t good for them just so they can have a wedding.

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    5012 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @Natalieh86:  One of DH’s exes is that sort of girl. She had a dress bought for a wedding that was called off so she just found the next guy within a few weeks and continued on with the wedding plans so she didn’t have to change HER day.

    Said guy has kicked her and her two year old daughter out of his flat a few times and generally doesn’t seem to be a particularly stand-up guy… but still she goes back to him so she doesn’t have to call off the wedding. Stupid girl!

    Post # 8
    Member
    466 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I got so annoyed while I was planning my wedding, my single friends would talk about what their weddings would be like. They’d hardly let me talk about my actual wedding that was actually taking place within the next 3 months.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3183 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @SpecialSundae:  Maybe there’s still time to find a replacement!  Seriously how does that not freak a guy out?? 

    Post # 10
    Member
    5012 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @Natalieh86:  I’ve no idea! She’s had three fiances in the two years that I’ve known her.

    Post # 11
    Member
    252 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I had a friend like this and it was CREEPY.

    You see, I had never given much thought to my wedding, but after FI & I attended a family wedding last summer that was ABSOLUTELY beautiful, I knew FI was thinking about proposing in the near future. I mentioned this to my ex-friend- who hadn’t had a bf in over a year, and no potential suitors in site- who immediately started sending me files and folders she had been saving for years. She had her entire wedding planned out. The dress, the colors, the cake. She was already saying she wouldn’t accept anything other than a diamond because it’s “traditional” and all this other weird shit (that isn’t even true!) It was SO bizarre. I was thinking “This is the reason you don’t have a bf, you ooze of desperation” because I do think that those people- the ones that are further ahead in planning their dream wedding than I am in doing my REAL wedding- are fucking desperate and need a hobby. We’re not talking, like, people who might daydream about their special day(like jomir mentioned, I think that’s normal) we’re talking someone who probably has potential vendors on speed dial, for when the day comes.

    I dont talk to this girl anymore, for a host of other reasons, but her Bridezilla stuff has always stuck out to me as just WEIRD.

     

    ETA I also think pre-planning a wedding really takes away from the point of marriage. FI and I aren’t doing this for the floral centerpieces, we’re doing this to be a family! The colors and flwers are just minor details, not the REASON for to get married.

    Post # 12
    Member
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I think it’s fine for people to be excited or bookmark things. I never got the whole dreaming of my wedding since I was little girl behavior. Eventually I would hope people would grow up and realize that it’s about more then being princess for a day, and it’s a represetation of two people not just the bride, and the most important thing isn’t the wedding but marriage.

    Buying dresses booking vendors is all nuts and crazy talk. If I was guy who met a someome like this I RUN FAST IN THE OTHER DIRECTION.

    Post # 15
    Member
    418 posts
    Helper bee

    I feel like it’s okay to browse wedding websites and find things you DO and DON’T like (ahem). But, I do think it’s pretty ridiculous to make these decisions without a significant other. The whole point of a wedding is to MARRY someone else. I hate Brides who say “It’s MY Day” … it’s a WEDDING, for Pete’s sake! It’s supposed to be OUR day. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    When I read the article, it bothered me because I felt that the future man would have no say.

    Granted- in the majority of weddings, the bride is the planner, and yes, I had ideas before FI planned. But the big decisions need to be made as a *couple*- the preplanning makes it seem like the fairy-tale wedding party is more important to these women than the marriage.

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