(Closed) Single Guests – 2 lines on RSVP = HELP!

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think it would be rude, like you’re calling attention to the fact that they’re not allowed to bring a guest. Not sure if there’s anything you can do, I’m sorry!

Post # 4
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I wouldn’t worry about it. If the invite is addressed to a single name, most people probably won’t write a second (I would never do this without checking first). And if they do, for the handful of people, maybe you can just make a phone call?

Post # 5
11343 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

Do your invitations include inner envelopes as well as outer envelopes? Inner envelopes bearing the names of the guests are the most effective manner in which to specify to whom the invitation is being extended.  If you send an invitation to “Miss Jane Doe,” and she sends you a response indicating “and guest” or “Miss Jane Doe and Mr. John Smith,” you may call her and explain.  “Hi! I received your response card today.  My fiance and I are thrilled that you’ll be able to join us for our big day! Unfortuntely, we noticed that you also included a guest.  I’m so sorry, but the invitation was for you alone. I’m sure you understand that, due to (pick whatever is honest and appropriate: the space limitations of our venue/our wedding budget/the number of family members on both sides whom we have to accommodate, etc.) we just couldn’t allow our single guests to bring a date to the wedding.  However, we can’t wait to see you, and we would love to meet (name of intended extra guest) sometime.  Perhaps we can get together when (name of fiance) and I get back from our honeymoon?”

Post # 6
1486 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would just assume people won’t add guests unless you said it was ok and deal with it when it happens if it does. 

Post # 7
1235 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@HnyBee: Ugh. I hate it when people don’t allow singletons to bring a date. It really sucks for the singl-ys. 

Post # 8
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@MsNarwhal: Sometimes it’s just not feasable to allow guests, in my case, the few people I am inviting who are single aren’t allowed to bring a guest because if I allowed them to bring someone I don’t know I would have to remove someone I cared about to allow their stranger to come. Yeah, it sucks, but I have limited seating and room at my venue, and I would rather have all my people there than someone I don’t know.

Post # 9
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I have two lines on my RSVPs, and for singles, I’ve indicated that I have reserved one seat in their honor.  

Post # 10
1309 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@MsNarwhal: it’s one thing if they’re engaged, married, or living together – but otherwise nobody’s entitled to a date. Look at it this way, does it suck more for the singleton to attend the wedding of someone they really care about by themselves, mingling and maybe even finding a significant other (this used to be how a lot of people met their spouses back in the day!) or does it suck more for the wedding couple to have some random dude they don’t know show up in their wedding pictures, drinking their booze and scarfing their food. Three weeks later the couple has broken up and he’s just That One Guy who came to the wedding.

OP I think you should just leave that second line blank. Only people who don’t know proper etiquette will fill in with an uninvited guest’s name, and those few can be gently corrected as @Brielle suggests above. Don’t stress about it.

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