Single White Female Situation? Or Harmless Girl Who Needs Friends?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: What should I do?
    'Unfriend' her : (66 votes)
    41 %
    She's harmless and probably socially awkward. Try being her friend. : (3 votes)
    2 %
    Talk to her about it. : (9 votes)
    6 %
    I'd be creeped out, too. Don't 'unfriend' her, but ignore her/keep your distance. : (82 votes)
    51 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2124 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @petalpetal:  This is definitely super creepy. I wouldn’t necessarily unfriend her because she might flip out given the evidence. I would first talk to her about how you feel and then keep your distance from her. Everyting you mentioned is definitely not okay and she has severely surpassed what is socially acceptable. 

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    1864 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Holy crap she nuts. I’d unfriend her. No explanation needed. Creepy is not even the word. More like obsessed and stalkerish! Sounds like one of those nutso chicks in those scary movie thrillers. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    416 posts
    Helper bee

    Hide her from seeing your updates without unfriending her.

    Post # 6
    Member
    198 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I only said don’t unfriend her because I don’t want her murdering you in your sleep or something to get revenge over unfriending her.

     

    But seriously. W. T. F.

    Post # 8
    Member
    748 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I would put her on restricted so she can’t learn any new info, but not unfriend because she might wig out. CREEPY TO A MAJOR DEGREE. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    171 posts
    Blushing bee

    I would cut all ties immediately…If she needs friends, THIS is why. Nobody wants to be friends with someone that creepy. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    883 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I’d unfriend her, definitely. It’s very strange behaviour. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    6964 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2015

    @petalpetal:  I wouldn’t unfriend her bc she might do something crazy. I wouldn’t even “restrict” her bc that is pretty obvious when it’s been done to you. Instead I’d start blocking her from seeing new posts and pics. Basically, when you go to post there’s that little head icon where you can make things public or friends only or whatever. There’s also “friends only except…”  . Just choose her name to exclude from the post on anything even remotely personal. Maybe she’ll get bored and move on to someone else. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    164 posts
    Blushing bee

    Unfriend her.  The longer this goes on, the worse her behaviour will become and eventually she will suffocate you. 

    She may not know where you live now, but I bet she will do her darnest to find you.  Would you like her at your front door?  Would you like her hanging around your SO?

    Unfriend and tell her it’s not going to work out.  Give her a clear boundary or she will steamroll your life.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1167 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @petalpetal:  Agreed – suuuuuper creepy-licious!

    My best advice after seeing many people (albeit quite a lot younger than I presume you are) be that girl, lusting after being best friends and just like (well, more like clones of) my best friend the super-queen of crazy people, I would bring it up gently first.

    Hey, she might not even realise how creepy it is if she is THAT starved for friends. At least talk to the poor woman before you ditch her ass!

    Post # 15
    Member
    1892 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @petalpetal:  I wouldn’t confront or unfriend her – but I would limit the posts she can see on your FB and back off from returning any more calls. Clearly this makes you uncomfortable and I say trust your gut and let things cool off with this “friendship”. I am a big fan of doing “the fade” when it comes to backing away from people who may be unstable. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    2649 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    @petalpetal:  Its possible she’s just awkward but I would be creeped out too. I wouldn’t talk to her about it – there’s really no nice way to tell someone they’re weird and creeping you out.

    Do a slow fade. Is there any way you can hide your posts from her without blocking or unfriending her? If not, maybe take a break from Facebook for awhile. I think the less information you give her at this point, the better. Let her focus on something/someone else for awhile.

    If she does get you on the phone and is snarky because you haven’t been available or called her back – use it as an opportunity to set a boundary. “X, I’m sorry you’re annoyed but I’m very busy right now and don’t know when I’ll be available again.” As for your wedding, “our wedding is going to be extremely small, family only so unfortunately, we can’t invite everyone we might like too.” 

    If she amps up the weirdness or gets stalkery, cut her off. Block her on Facebook, email, your phone. And ignore any and all attempts she makes to reach you. Save any communications from her just in case she escalates beyond that. 

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