- 9 years ago
- Wedding: December 1969
So, I’m writing this for the mere fact of just venting. I can’t vent or talk to the one person I talk to everything about – my fiance (who’s sister it is). So basically, my sis-in law to be is not really my cup of tea. To be fair, she’s not a terrible person; however, she’s very controlling & I’m beginning to realize completely and utterly self involved. She’s older then both me & my fiance, she’s been married for about 8yrs and has 2 children – both of whom are her one and only. Her life basically revolves around them from morning to night. That’s all she ever thinks about.
Anyways, I asked her to be one of my 7 BM’s in my upcoming wedding. I thought it would be the nice thing to do & also the right thing, as she will be a big part of my life & I knew it was also important to my FI. I also thought it would be a perfect opportunity to get to know some new girls & have a good time. I’m not joking when I write this, but she has NO friends. The only people she surrounds herself with (other then her 2 kids & husband) are the immediate family. She won’t got out on dates w/ her husband, as she doesn’t want to leave the kids alone w/ a babysitter (they are 5 & 3). She has no fun and apparently prefers it that way. So, like I said, I thought this would be an ideal situation to her get her back into “LIFE.” How could I have been so wrong???
Now, I know it’s not right for me to know about certain things that are going on w/in the bridal party (i.e -details about my shower and bachelorette) but the one thing I did want to know was the date for my bridal shower. Which I do know – but that’s it. Nothing more. However, through the grapevine, well actually some of my family members that are in the bridal party, I began to hear complaints regarding my SIL behavior & attitude. Apparently she is taking full control and not being nice about it at all. She delivers insulting remarks and rude comments to most of the bridal party & is very opionated about EVERYTHING. The rest of my party is quite reserved and have been trying, very delicately, to work w/ her, but are still having difficult times doing so. The one factor that is making the whole situation even harder is the fact that my future Mom in law is paying for a huge portion of the shower, which has led the rest of my girls to feel awkward about any types of disagreeing. Everytime someone offers a suggestion or alternative idea to one of hers, she runs to her mother and tells her. It’s so childish and I can honestly not believe this is all going on. I am so hurt and angry about the situation, but not sure how to go about handling everything. I tried speaking to my FI about it, but that just wound up in a huge argument regarding how I shouldn’t know anything & also that he didn’t want to hear me bad mouthing his sis. It was hopeless.
Another huge thing thats upsetting me is the fact that she’s very outdated… she’s choosing decor that, well, is just not ME or doesn’t necesarily scream class. I mean not to be shallow, but c’mon. My one good friend who is actually a professional wedding planner has tried interjecting but keeps getting shot down. She really wants to handle all the decor for the shower, but is having trouble dealing w/ my SIL. Also, it just came to my attention ( i know, i know, I shouldn’t know any of this) but she didn’t even consult w/ the rest of the bridal party regarding the shower favors and just went ahead & made them. When she told the party they were NOT huge fans of the idea.. but I guess it’s too late.
I’m just so frustrated and beside myself w/ anger that I don’t know where to direct anything. There are so many other things that she has done regarding this whole wedding process that has upset both me and my FI… she has decided to not partake in any of the pictures before the ceremony/reception, as she feels that her kids need to nap since it’s a long day. Are you kidding????? Also, our reception ends at 11:30.. she’ll be leaving at 10:30.. WHY????
Again, this was merely just to vent, but feel free to comment or voice opinions or share your own family/ in law drama woes. And maybe this doesn’t sound as bad as I’m making it out to be.. but I’m just pissed.
Thanks for reading, if you so chose.