Sister In Law Drama

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
3632 posts
Sugar bee

With someone that volitile, I think you should delete/block her from Facebook. And her threat of having bodily harm done to you can be a matter for the police.

Post # 3
Member
746 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

hell id be flabberghasted too!!!!!!! Thats a bit rediculous, theres more than one with mental illness in my SO’s family on both sides…I think that was more a threat she isnt going to follow through with, cuz ive heard that before too…

But the pp is right, I would block and delete her from FB, just because you will no longer be able to post new statuses about anything philosophy wise or anything else for that matter cuz she jsut may think its a direct stab at her.

Just keep your head up, and your guard when you are alone just to be safe.

Im sorry you are going thru this bee 🙁

Big hugs, keep us updated

Post # 4
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’m sorry you’re going through this. The only advice I have is to try not to let what his family thinks worry you. If they know his sister well, and are aware of her mental health issues, they probably won’t even think to lend credence to the things she’s saying. Good luck. 

Post # 6
Member
7243 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I think when you post passive agressive statements like that to fb you shouldn’t be surprised when someone thinks it is about them. Most people would probably not say anything to your face but unfortunately your SIL is mentally ill and off her meds so her reactions are going to be different to someone on their meds or without mental illness.

I think for now you and your husband need to push any ill feelings aside and help support your IL’s with helping SIL to get well again. When she is well again have a chat with her about the incident. Do not be accusatory but talk about how when she did x it made you feel x. Also I would admit that in hindsight you feel like the fb post wasn’t a great idea since it was so open to being misconstrued. 

Just remember that this isn’t personal and that it is her illness that is making her act this way.

 

 

Post # 7
Member
769 posts
Busy bee

Yikes!! :/

You really do not deserve this type of treatment from anyone. So I would definitely keep my distance from her at all times especially during this time in your life. Good luck, OP

Post # 8
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

And that is why I hate ambigious facebook posts! Yeah, she over reacted. However, people who post things on facebook like you did drive me nuts. It’s usually about someone and everyone who sees it will think back wondering if it’s them. “Did I say or do something to make this person upset?” Throw in some mental health issues, and you have a major problem. Many schizo’s, certain types of personality disorders, and sometimes those in an acute manic state think everything they read, watch on TV, or over hear is directed specifically to them. Sorry hun. As far as facebook goes, if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it. And if you wouldn’t want your post in the local paper, don’t say it. Your post is a passive agressive, depressive statement. I’m not trying to attack you or make you feel bad. Just don’t say stuff like that in the future.

Post # 9
Member
2013 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I can’t get passed the fact that you dated your husband, became good friends with his sister and have been married for time- yet you didn’t know that she has issues. I feel like that is something I would warn my SO of just in case my sibling went through something in their presence. Or in order to not have to explain in the middle of a meltdown, they’d already know the sibling has a known issue. You have to slowly get over it and hope she gets back on her meds, I bet she will be embarrassed or she may not even mention it. I hope for her sake she gets on her meds and gets her life back, as for you getting jumped I seriously doubt that’s going to happen.

Post # 10
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Also, you can’t have a logical, reasonable conversation with someone that is not on their meds for a major mental health disease. She needs to get stabalized first. Even then, it might not be worth it to bring it up again. She will either realize and apologize for what she said in her acute state, or she will rationalize her words and actions. Many times, in order for them to feel better about themselves, they will confabulate, dismiss, or sometimes do a combination of both. You have a great hubby and he loves you. I now have the song let it go stuck in my head.

Post # 13
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

And I’m going to post one more time. Sorry. Some families like to hide mental health problems, which could be why you didn’t know about it. The family may have figured that she was stabalized on her meds and she would be fine from there on out. Then the person has problems again and everyone is confused. Unfortunately, that is a common cycle.

Post # 15
Member
6852 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

And this is why you shouldn’t post passive aggresive crap on facebook. Someone will always take it personally or assume it’s about them.

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