(Closed) Sister in law trouble

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
3786 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

She sounds like she likes to be surrounded by drama.  I understand you feel bitter but she is you SIL, and you really have no option but to be civil.  C’est la vie.

Post # 4
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You are very wrong.

Wrong to think you would feel anything but bitterness toward this girl

Wrong to think this will ever change

Wrong to take on the weight of not giving a wedding gift (your husband was party to this decision) 

And VERY wrong to think she will ever be anything but toxic.  

EVERYTHNG you need to know about this girl was revealed in the first sentence.  Somehow you need to find someone you can trust (a therapist a clergy) and get your husband to go in with you.  This girl is destructive and will bring problems to anyone who is in her life.  You dont have to do anything but be polite and be a good wife and mother in your own family.  I am concerned that some day your husband will lose sight of what is important, side with her once and create a problem in his marriage.  HE is the one who needs to understand not to lose focus, to keep his eye on the ball and to not let this person have an influence on his family.  That is his job, you have been through enough and will make yourself crazy trying to appease this monster.  Make sure your husband knows what is what, I want you to have help to make him see that you are always his priority and that he must protect the relationship.  If you dont know someone to trust…try having your parents sit him down because otherwise I fear it could cause you trouble in your relationship.  

You will never be able to fix everything, take care of what matters, you and your husband.  Be polite, limit your exposure, do not choose them to be godparents or any other role in your life and pray that she gets help one day.

Good Luck. Your husband has been acting like a weenie as has his father, marshall your resources, your instincts are right, you’ve been giving everyone too much credit.

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