(Closed) Sisters – ARGH!

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

No- you have reason to be upset.  My older sister got married on my birthday… and we haven’t celebrated my birthday together since.  Why…  because you know, that’s when her anniversary falls. “It’s my anniversary, you know.”  That seems small in comparison to what is going on with you; I’m glad you were flexible and pulled a changeup on the FSIL from hell.  That is the lowest thing in the world to upstage a planned wedding with an event of your own that saps people’s resources and travel time.  My advice, is to detach yourself from any negativity and to ignore the jealousy- that’s what it is- and make your event as elegant and dignified as possible.  There is no revenge quite like living well:-)

Post # 4
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Oh no, BIG HUG!!

It’s insane how people behave when weddings are brought up, trust me, I can relate!

One thing I have learned: DON’T TALK ABOUT IT.  There are a few girls I can talk wedding shop to but the rest I have to be careful because copying, criticizing, and general unwanted comments. 

Second thing I have learned: Don’t care about them.  That is SO hard for me since I am a people pleaser but at some point you get the “screw’em” mentality and you are just done with it all.

I’m 38 days out and I am finally hitting the point of being happy for the Mister and I and not caring if anyone elses comes.  This day is for us anyhow.

Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I went through a VERY simlar thing with my soon to be SIL… it’s FI’s brother’s fiance, and she copied EVERYTHING and put their wedding before ours, at the same reception hall… I was devestated.  Now that we are a year out from the drama, I can see that it’s not worth getting into with people… eveyone will have their opinions, and your best bet is to try and focus on what’s going on, and what fun you will have, even with people being crazy around you!! Hope it turns a little easier for you as well!!

Post # 7
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I am so sorry thats happening to you!  You’re wedding should be just about the 2 of you…screw everyone else!  Maybe it would be nice if you and your Fi had an intimate event, maybe just ya’ll at a Bed & Breakfast or go away just you 2 and have a DW!  I hope it works out, but don’t feel like your alone, we all have fam drama-me too!  My sister & niece aren’t coming to our wedding, but I’ve dealt with it and we’re okay now!  Don’t let them get to you…take care of you first!

Post # 8
Member
1545 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Oh no i am so sorry! it feels like that are trying to steal your thunder!

Post # 9
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’m so sorry that you are dealing with all of this drama. I completely undersatand, as I am in a similar situation with my sister. I also stopped working in January due to a medical condition, so I am not bringing any income to the table right now. We have decided to cut our guest list in half and only invite a few family and close friends who are supportive and active in our lives, but we are still having our wedding. It is our main focus, and we are not letting anyone stop us from doing what we initially wanted. I hope that you and yo FI get married soon and find peace without all the drama from others.

Post # 10
Member
711 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Wow. What a bit#h! I say, screw them, go on a fabulous vacation, get married, stay on the vacation longer, come back, and bask in wedded bliss. And I agree with other posts – don’t bring it up, if others ask about the wedding just give a breif response and move on, and remember what’s important. Hugs to you!

Post # 11
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Poor you! So horrible. To hell with them. Really. Just let it go: don’t engage, don’t get into it, your blood pressure will take off! God people can be so rotten. You’re marrying your man. That’s all that’s important about it, really. Take care of yourself.

Post # 12
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Hey just go off on your own together and get married then.

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